**Hi all. I am sooo in love with writing and absolutely adore JKR's characters that I am back for another go at it. This is quite a departure from my last fic as it involves Severus, Lily and James during there fifth year at Hogwarts. I hope you all enjoy it.
~nevillesgirl
Edit: Every chapter posted after chapter 18 is done post Deathly Hallows and may have cannon base to my fanfic. If you haven't read Book seven yet and do not want any ideas of any possible plotlines to that story, you may not wish to continue reading until after you have finished the book. Thanks for reading.
PRELUDE TO DESTINY

CHAPTER 1
START OF TERM ULTIMATUM

Severus blinked his eyes trying to accustom them to the pitch blackness surrounding him. He licked the corner of his mouth and tasted blood. His father would never find him here. Severus had made a trap door in his closet. He had enough room to sit comfortably with a book while over head no one suspected he was sitting beneath the floor boards.

One day soon that man would never lay another hand on him. One day soon he would be the one dangling in the air and thrown to the ground. Severus closed his eyes and took several deep breaths to calm him. Slowly the images of alcohol and violence began to fade and gave way to strawberry colored hair blowing in the breeze.

They were moving into the house next door and they had two daughters, one of which was around his age. Severus sat high in the oak tree in his yard and watched her for an hour. His father was calling him but he ignored it. As she helped her family unload boxes from their station wagon, her hair flowed gently to the music the wind was playing. She was hypnotic, bending and lifting with athletic grace, she walked energetically from the car to the house.

Then she turned and looked directly at him. Though Severus knew he was obscured by branches and thick leaves, she stared as though she saw right through them. Her penetrating green eyes stifled the air around him, making it hard to breath. Never in his short nine years of living has another human being had this effect on him.
-X-

Severus woke with a start and rubbed his eyes. 5:30a.m. He could try and roll over and go back to sleep but it would be no use. Here it was six years later and Severus still shivered with excitement when he dreamt about the first time he saw Lily Evans.

Severus climbed out of bed and got dressed. He may as well start packing. They were leaving for Kings Cross at ten o'clock and his father hated it if they ever ran late. Severus packed quickly. He was hoping to have a few moments with Lily before they left for the train station. As always, the summer holiday seemed to fly by and then he would go back to loving Lily in secret.

Severus remembers like it was yesterday his first year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. He and Lily had struck up an amazing friendship for the two years since her family had moved next door and then his Hogwarts letter had arrived. Severus had always known it would come for he was already aware of his magical ability and had been practicing it for years under the close supervision of his mother.

Lily however, had no idea he was a wizard and with great regret, Severus remembers the sadness in her eyes when he told her he was to attend a boarding school and would see her only over the summer vacation.

No one was more shocked then Severus to find Lily Evans sitting alone in a car on the Hogwarts Express. The train ride was phenomenal with Lily sharing everything about her parentage and all the funny things that would happen to her while at home. They talked for the entire journey and when she took his hand and squeezed it in excitement, Severus thought he might explode from the shockwave it sent through his body.

Then it happened, the sorting. That first night in the Great Hall, Severus and Lily stood with the other first years waiting expectantly to be sorted into their houses. The Sorting Hat's song had explained about each house with enthusiasm:



Lily was promptly sorted into Gryffindor. She smiled at Severus and joined her house at their table. When the sorting hat was placed on Severus' head, it took its time before finally placing him in Slytherin. He was disappointed because his time with Lily would be limited. He didn't realize how limited until he caught some of the conversation at his own table. Gryffindor and Slytherin were mortal enemies. To be caught talking with any one of them, let alone being friendly to any of them was practically forbidden.

Severus shook his head and closed his trunk. 6:15 a.m., just enough time for a quick breakfast before he met Lily on her front porch. Heading downstairs Severus recalls how difficult the last four years have been. It was one thing to keep their friendship a secret but quite another when he asked Lily to be his girlfriend. James Potter had been sniffing around lately, always trying to get Lily's attention. Sloshing milk down his black sweater, Severus scowled.

James Potter.
Severus never liked James or his best friend Sirius Black. They were popular, good looking and great at just about everything they tried. What's more they knew it too. James and Sirius would change girlfriends quicker then they would change the ink in their ink bottles. The worst part of it was they were both in Gryffindor and had plenty of access to Lily.
A couple of times last year James had been as bold as to ask Lily out on a date. Severus thought since Lily kept turning down James' advances, that he would tire and look elsewhere for companionship. The problem was that never happened. The more Lily put James off, the harder he tried in his attempts to impress her. He was famous for showing off and picking on other students. Unfortunately Severus was often one of James' favorite targets.
Lily was sworn to secrecy about their relationship and so after a few half hearted attempts to try and stop James from bullying Severus; she resigned herself unhappily to watch the drama unfold.

Now entering his fifth year, Severus' hatred of James was stronger then ever. At least this year he had a couple of really good hexes to use on James and his friends. Spells of his own creation he had been working on all summer.

Severus wasn't hungry anymore. Clearing up his mess, he headed outside. It was quite warm already for only being seven o'clock in the morning as Severus walked over to Lily's house. He smiled as he opened the gate and saw her swinging lazily on her porch swing.

She looked cool and comfortable in her white Capri pants and lime green tank top. Her emerald green eyes sparkled and her rich strawberry hair was pulled into a slick braid.

Severus sat down beside her and leaned in for a kiss when she held her creamy hand up to his lips.

"We need to talk," she said seriously.

Severus raised his eyebrow questioningly but said nothing.

"Sev, I am tired of all this sneaking around," Lily started boldly. "I don't want to hide our relationship this year."

Severus began to protest but Lily cut him off. "Hang what your friends will think and mine for that matter. We were friends long before Hogwarts and their stupid inter house rules. The secrecy is smothering our relationship."

Lily stopped and stared at Severus, her deep green eyes piercing into his soul. She was right of course but what could he do? Slytherins were already outcasts from the other houses in general. If he revealed his relationship with Lily now, he would also become an outcast in his own house. That thought was just unthinkable.

"So here's the thing," said Lily confidently. "This year we will be a proper, public couple or we are finished. Is that clear enough for you?"

Severus looked at Lily with wonder. Who was this girl who lacked compassion for the predicament he was in? This was not his Lily. Severus ran his hands through his greasy hair. What was he going to do now?
*______________________________________________

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CHAPTER 2
OLD BATTLE, NEW SPELL

Severus sat alone in a compartment on the Hogwarts Express watching the rain whip sideways as the train steamed forward. The blackened sky did little to improve his mood as he continued to think about Lily's ultimatum.

He was thankful that Lily was not here with him at the moment, but off monitoring the corridors as was the custom of being a fifth year prefect. He still had no idea what his decision was going to be regarding his and Lily's relationship.

Before he left her house earlier that morning they had sat in companionable silence, Lily leaning back into his embrace as they swung easily on the porch swing. They talked briefly of the upcoming O.W.L.S they would be preparing for later that year and of the possible engagements the Slugclub would be having. In the end though Severus was unable to give Lily the firm commitment she was looking for. She told him he would have one chance to prove himself—on the train into Hogsmeade

Severus stood abruptly and began to pace the length of the compartment. In the two years that Lily has been his girlfriend he has never told her he loves her, though he did with an unquenchable fire that burned continually in the core of his soul. Did she know this? Did she love him too? If she does love him, how could she ask him to make an obviously poor choice?

The compartment door slide open and Severus turned expecting to see Lily. His smile faded and was quickly replaced by a scowl as he stared blankly at James Potter and his side-kick Sirius Black. Peter Pettigrew was hiding in the background, looking expectantly at his two friends.

"Gosh Sirius, what is that foul smell," asked James as he pinched his nose in disgust?
"I don’t know James,”said Sirius casually as he leaned against the opened compartment door. "Maybe Snivellus here has been experimenting with Dungbombs. What say you, fancy Dungbomb cologne Snivelly?"

Peter Pettigrew hopped up and down excitedly and James sniggered appreciatively at his best friend's comment.

Stealthily Snape's hand stole to the inside of his robes, grasping his wand. Looking at James and Sirius from between his greasy bangs Snape made his choice. Thinking "Levicorpus" he swished his wand towards James who was abruptly hoisted into the air by his left ankle revealing boxer underwear with a golden snitch print on it.

Severus looked over at Sirius whose jaw had dropped in astonishment and said, "You were saying, dragon breath?"

Before Sirius could respond Peter tripped through the compartment door as though shoved. Appearing in his place was Remus Lupin and Lily.
"I advise you to let him down," spoke Remus quietly.

Lily looked imploringly at him with her bright green eyes. Severus sighed. He never could resist the intensity of her gaze. Swishing his wand again, Snape lifted the curse and James came crashing to the floor with a thud.

Suddenly Sirius yelled "Densuago" and Severus' front teeth began to grow rapidly.

"That-is-enough!" said Lily sternly, her own wand now out and pointing directly at Sirius.

Eyeing it apprehensively Sirius backed away slowly stowing his wand back in his robes. "Hey Evans' what gives?"

"OUT," shouted Lily amidst slews of protest.

Peter, Remus, Sirius and James, one by one emptied the over crowed compartment. James looked quizzically at Lily and was met with an icy stare in return before shutting the door behind him.

Muttering the counter curse Lily shrank Severus' over-large, beaver teeth back to its normal size and hurried to his side. "Are you okay?" She asked with concern.

Instinctively Severus backed away, his eyes darting toward the door to see if anyone passing by was looking in.

Lily shrank away, embarrassment flushing crimson on her cheeks. "So this is your choice then?" She asked angrily.

"Lily, give me some time,”"Snape began softly. "You just sprang this on me this morning and you expect me to undo four years of habitually ignoring you. I can’t." At Lily's crestfallen expression Severus continued hurriedly. "You must give me time to try."

Checking again the compartment door, Severus leaned in and placed a light kiss on Lily's cheek. Then, fixing his expression into a violent scowl, he strode past her stiffly and left her staring after him bewildered.
*____________________________________

Lily stood rooted to the spot in the abandoned train compartment and gingerly touched her cheek. Severus has never shown the slightest bit of affection for her while at school before. This was indeed a most unexpected development. Maybe all he really needed was the time he asked for to adjust. Poking her head out of the door she watched him glide down the hall of the train, a dreamy expression on her face.

"Lily? Hey, Earth to Lily?"

Lily turned to face her friends Alice and Calliope.

"Huh? Oh, sorry Alice,”"said Lily grinning sheepishly.

"Who has got you looking all love struck?" asked Alice, following Lily's gaze down the hall.

"What?" Said Lily blushing furiously as she playfully shoved her best friend aside. "I don't know what you're talking about.'

"Um hmm," said Calliope as she exchanged a knowing look with Alice. "We saw you earlier, walking all cozy and comfy with Remus Lupin." Calliope poked her playfully in the ribs and whistled. "You know, now that you're both prefects you will be spending tons of time together."

"Whatever. Remus and I are just friends," said Lily as she moved back into the compartment and sank into the plush seat.

"How can you be friends with him? He's one of Potter's flunkies." Alice sat opposite Lily and began brushing her long, luminous chestnut curls.

"Yes well Remus is sane isn't he?" Said Lily matter-of-factly, rolling her eyes in mock annoyance. "You don’t see him showing off or behaving ridiculously at every opportune moment."

"Okay, okay," said Calliope. "By the way, did you guys see Sirius Black this year? Oooh yummy!" She pretended to faint onto the seat, her head landing gracefully in Lily's lap.

"Ick, you don't want any part of him," said Lily in disgust. "He's a scoundrel and you know it."

"Mmmm, but a handsome scoundrel," said Calliope, giggling.

"Callie, I thought you were over him," Asked Alice with concern dripping from her words?

"I'm mostly over him," said Calliope resigned. "It's just he's so fun to look at."

The three friends giggled at that last remark. The rest of the train ride proceeded with out incident. After stuffing themselves on Pumpkin Pasties and Licorice wands, Lily and her friends changed into heir robes and made their way to the platform at Hogsmeade Station.

A lull in the rain had every student clamoring for a carriage before a down pour started again. Someone violently shoved Lily from behind, sending her stumbling clumsily directly into James Potter who caught her around the waist before she fell into a mud puddle.

Straightening herself, Lily looked into James’ hazel eyes and was surprised by the softness she saw there.

Clearing his throat James asked, "All right there Evans?”" He promptly released her as though touching her burned him.

"Fine Potter," said Lily and hurried into an unoccupied carriage with her friends.

Several carriages down Severus stepped into his own carriage with a couple of Slytherins and tried to calm the beast that had erupted in his chest at the sight of James Potter’s arms around Lily's waist.
*_________________________________

**Thanks to all of you who have read so far. Pleas leave your FEEDBACK HERE
~nevillesgirl

Edited to cut the line out

CHAPTER 3
JEALOUSY’S UGLY HEAD

Every room in the boys dormitory of Gryffindor tower was silent except for the one occupied by James, Sirius, Remus, Peter and Frank. The boys were enjoying a rousing game of exploding snaps and discussing the strange events that had occurred upon the Hogwarts Express.

“Prongs, seriously, you probably should be more careful about the underpants you wear now that Snivellus has mastered the use of non-verbal spells,” said Sirius in between bouts of laughter.

“So you think it’s funny,” asked James, aiming his pillow directly for Sirius’ head. “It could be you next time you know.”

“Yeah,” said Sirius with a shrug, “but my underpants are sexy.”

“Looks like Snape has been practicing over the summer holiday,” said Remus Lupin scratching his head thoughtfully. “He must have gotten tired of being picked on the last couple of years.”

“I thought we didn’t start learning non-verbal spells until sixth year,” asked Peter curiously.

“Duh, Wormtail,” said Sirius sarcastically as he pushed Peter off the bed and toppled him to the floor. “I suppose we’ll just have to watch our backs from now on.”

“Hey Frank, what are you doing in the corner all by yourself,” called Peter from the floor changing the subject quickly.

Frank Longbottom glanced up from his Transfiguration book and looked at Peter. “I’m getting a head start on the transfiguration reading McGonagall is likely to assign us tomorrow.”

“Whatcha wanna do that for,” sneered Peter viciously.

“Because, ratboy, it’s probably going to come up on our Ordinary Wizarding Level exams,” said Frank smartly.

“Ha ha, ratboy, that’s hilarious Frank,” laughed Sirius as he slide off his bed to fiddle with a floorboard underneath. After resurfacing with five butter beers he grinned and winked at James.

“Hey James, that Evans sure is looking hot this year,” he said suggestively and eyed his best friend with interest.

“Hot? I don’t think so,” protested James, struggling to keep his voice nonchalant. “The Ice Princess is as frigid as ever. Her holiday at the North Pole seems to have regenerated her chill factor.”

“Whatever man,” said Remus, a slight blush creeping up his neck. “We all know you’re into her.”

James looked over to Lupin and noticing the pink tinge on his neck said, “Why don’t you go out with her Moony? You’re the one who’s going to be spending tons of time with her this year, being a prefect all.”
Please don’t go after her; please don’t go after her thought James to himself.

Remus choked on his butter beer sloshing it down his chin. “Come on, you know we’re just friends. Besides, she’s the only one besides you guys who knows about, what did she call it; my 'furry little problem'.”

“Speaking of problems,” said Sirius conversationally, “I wonder what’s gotten into Evans. I mean, it was almost like she was defending that grease ball,” he said, speaking of Severus Snape.

“Yeah Padfoot, but you know Evans, always taking things too seriously,” said James noncommittally. “It’s bound to get worse this year since she’s been made a prefect. Hey Moony, maybe you could try and keep her off our backs.”

“Right, little Miss Over-achiever, I’ll try,” said Remus. “I can’t promise you anything though.”

But James wasn’t listening anymore. He had just glimpsed a stream of dark red hair inconspicuously concealed under a thick, black coat streak outside across the grounds and heading towards the Forbidden Forest.

-X-

Lily stole quickly across the damp lawn making sure to be as quiet as possible as she neared Hagrid’s hut. The low snores thundering through the half opened window told her she needn’t have worried. He probably passed out after consuming too much of Madam Rosemerta’s famous oak mead.

Looking over her shoulder guiltily Lily prayed silently that on one had seen her leaving the castle. A fifth year prefect was only allowed out past curfew if they were patrolling the corridor around their house common room. Only the Head Boy and Girl were permitted to patrol outdoors after dark.

Lily shivered in excitement at the prospect of breaking the rules. Never before has she ever gone against the policies and by-laws of the school charter. Then again, Severus has never asked her to meet him during the course of a term before.

The crescent moon cast eerie shadows on the trees and branches as Lily quickened her pace. Severus was already there she saw upon arriving at a small clearing deep in the forest. Tomorrow some awestruck first years would no doubt have their first lesson on unicorns here but tonight it was just for her and Severus.

When Severus did not welcome her warmly, Lily slowed her footsteps and looked questioningly at him. “I was surprised to get your owl Sev,” said Lily cautiously. The hard glint in his eyes was something she had only seen when he was looking at Potter or one of his friends. His use of it now caused her to falter slightly in her approach.

“So,” spat Severus, his arms crossed protectively across his chest. “Have you taken to flirting with Potter now?”

Severus began to pace menacingly. He noticed Lily flinch uncomfortably in agitation.

“What?” Lily stopped walking, frozen by the hatred in his accusation.

“I-saw-you,” he said venomously through clenched teeth. “Over by the carriages earlier, he was hugging you. And-and you let him touch you with those filthy hands.”

Severus was shaking with rage. His emotions were boiling dangerously just below the surface of his control, threatening to break free.
“Your mine,” he growled as he thrust his hands from his robe and gripped Lily’s shoulders roughly, shaking her slightly.

“If I’m yours,” shouted Lily passionately, “then why are we sneaking around, hiding in the Forbidden Forest? Why aren’t we walking the corridors together holding hands like a normal couple?”

Her breathing was rough and ragged and Severus could see that Lily was gearing up for an argument. Experience told him to cut her off quickly before she got started.
“We shouldn’t have to parade our affections for others to see,” Severus said indignantly. “I am not as obvious as that swindler Black.”

Lily took a deep breath to steady her rising temper. “Look,” Lily started evenly. “People don’t know that I am attached because I can’t tell them. They wouldn’t believe me even if I did. The only way to prove to everyone…okay prove to Potter,” said Lily seeing Severus raise his left eyebrow challengingly, “is to show him.”

Severus noticed the uncertain pause grasping at Lily’s next words.
“What is it?” He prompted.

“Are…are you ashamed of me?” asked Lily as she hung her head dolefully.

Severus’ rigid posture instantly abated and his arms stole lovingly around her, pulling Lily into his chest. Severus buried his face into her hair and murmured softly, “Of course not. You are brilliant and I am honored that you would choose to be with me.”

Severus paused putting his thin index finger under he chin, lifting her face to meet his gaze. “It’s just that times are dangerous. For your own safety it is best that no one knows about us.”

Severus covered Lily’s pouting lips with his fingers. “Please don’t argue with me on this matter.”

Smiling, Lily nodded.

“Hey, you’re a prefect. Best not get caught out of bounds on your fist day.” He said mildly.

“Is that your way of politely informing me I should return to the castle?”

“Mmmm, after a fashion,” said Severus huskily as he lowered his lips onto Lily’s for a soft kiss.

*_________________

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CHAPTER 4
NOTICABLE POTENTIAL

Severus tossed and turned in fitful sleep. Dreams of the past invaded his mind tormenting him of happier and simpler days.
-X-
Lily sat under the formidable structure of London Bridge, her toes teasing the waters edge. It was a blistering summer day—they were ten years old and Severus was helping Lily get over her fear of the water. Her sleek dark blue one piece swimsuit clung damp with sweat to her pre-adolescent figure. The words ‘Queen Bee’ printed in bright yellow brought a smile to his face.

“I can’t do it Severus,”cried Lily desperately as she inched away from the waterline.

Severus frolicked in the water a bit, then took a deep breath and went under. After about a minute he surfaced, popping up directly in front of Lily who was crying hysterically.

“Hey,” Snape sputtered, spitting water from his lips. “I’m fine. I was just holding my breath.”

Emerging from the cool water, Severus’ feet burned as they touched the rocky bank. “C’mon Lil,” he coaxed. “I’ll buy you a banana split with extra whipped cream from the Ice Cream Parlor when we’re done.”

Taking her hand Severus slowly walked backwards, immersing himself up to his knees. Lily’s terrified whimpers caused him to stop. “Look at me. Good. Focus on my eyes. Good. Don’t break the connection.”

It was powerful. For the first time in his life, Severus opened himself to another. It was a dubious feeling; scary and unsheltered. As Lily held his gaze, they entered into the fragile realm of trust and when it was over Lily was chest deep in the water, holding tight to Severus’ hands.
-X-
“Sev, hey Sev man, wake up. There’s a message for you in the common room,” Avery said groggily as he shook Severus awake unceremoniously.

Pushing up Severus yawns. “Who is it from?” He asks tiredly.

“Floo network, I think it’s Malfoy.”

Snapping to attention Severus dresses quickly and left for the common room even as Avery climbed into bed and went back to sleep.

The faint glow of the dying hearth barely gave off enough heat to warm the common room. Severus tightened his black and green scarf about his neck and walked briskly to it, thankful that the common room was deserted this early Saturday morning. Dropping to one knee and peering into the flames, Severus waited. It wasn’t long before the easy crackles of the glistening embers allude to a soft popping sound and Lucius Malfoy’s head appeared.

“I thought you’d never get here Severus,” said Malfoy impatiently. “I have to get into work this morning.”

“My apologies Lucius,” said Snape reverently. “How is your job at the Ministry?”

"Fine, fine. My position has many…advantages,” Malfoy said mysteriously. “The reason for this visit is to inform you that the Dark Lord has taken notice of your extreme potential in a variety of areas. He wishes to have you meet one of his top officials for screening.”

“Screening for what exactly?” Asks Snape curiously.

“Everything will be explained to you in due time. For now, you must go through The Process, in which the first step is your observation.” Lucius paused, choking briefly on the coals then continued. “Today during the Hogsmeade visit, you will be observed by his followers. They will determine if your actions and comments are worthy of the Dark Lord’s consideration. Prepare yourself.”

Severus rose staring at the empty flames frowning slightly at the predicament he was in. He was supposed to meet Lily at the Shrieking Shack. They had been planning the rendezvous for weeks.

Settling into a squishy moss-green armchair Severus tilted his head back and contemplated. In recent years, news of this Dark Lord’s rise to power has plagued the newspapers. The Ministry of Magic’s ineffectual tactics to deter his ascent has been the front page news of The Daily Prophet almost weekly. Severus, like most people, has heard of the stories of torture and murder. He has heard of his unimaginable power and the unstoppable Dark Magic that he uses to coerce and control whomever he wishes.

Until this morning, that has always been someone else problem to deal with. Now, if he is correct in his assessment of the situation, he is being recruited by this Dark Wizard; the one who calls himself Voldemort. Voldemort hates muggles with a loathing worthy of the pit of eternal darkness. This puts Lily in danger. The Dark Lord must never discover the connection between me and Lily thought Snape.

Voices from the staircases drifted into the common room. People were coming down to breakfast. Severus got up and moved through the porthole to the Great Hall. He doesn’t feel like encountering any of his friends right now.

-X-


“Severus, will you get with the program please,” teases Evan Rosier.

“Huh? Oh, sorry,” mumbles Severus, his eyes shifting from left to right nervously.

“It’s your turn,” said Rosier impatiently as he used a trip jinx on a couple of unsuspecting third year Gryffindors, who sprawled clumsily onto the pavement.

“Right,” said Severus, somewhat distractedly as he searched the crowd for his next victim. Passing Honeyduke’s Sweet Shop, Severus saw a pretty muggle fourth year kissing her boyfriend on the bench outside. Jabbing his friend in the ribs, Severus pointed his want at the happy couple.

Rosier, Avery and Wilkes broke into fits of laughter as the girls eyebrows began to grow at an alarming rate. Soon her entire face was obscured by thick, auburn hair.

“So are you going to tell us why you keep looking all dreamy or what?” Inquires Avery as the laughter quieted.

“What do you mean,” asks Severu?

“Okay, pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about,” said Avery wickedly. “But you may as well bed the girl already.”

“What, who?” asks Severus, as alarms sound off loudly in his head. They couldn’t possibly have found out about Lily!
“Vespa Crouch that’s who,” replies Wilkes knowingly. “Tell me you didn’t know she’s been hot under the collar for you’re since third year?”

“Is that the overweight girl with the pudgy cheeks and dimple in her chin?”

“Yeah, so you have noticed her,” smirks Avery, lightly shoving Severus off the sidewalk.

“Shut up you morons,” snaps Severus impatiently. “Do you know what I have noticed though, is Little Miss Perfect Evans heading towards the Shrieking Shack—alone.”

Oh my gosh! What are you doing? Severus you idiot!

“Excellent target mate,” sneers Rosier excitedly. “Let’s go.”

*_________________________

**Snape! What have you done?! Leave your FEEDBACK HERE. You know you want to...

CHAPTER 5
COWARDLY BETRAYAL

“Come on,” said Severus nervously. “Let’s go find that arrogant braggart Potter instead.”

“Potter will be surrounded by his friends. This is better. Evans never goes anywhere alone,” said Avery.

Severus shrunk into the background as the Slytherins tramped their way down the partially snowy path to the Shrieking Shack. Severus could see Lily standing over by the fence drumming her lovely fingers impatiently. He could not believe he has just put Lily in danger. He was such a coward. Why couldn’t he stand up to his friends?

“Lost Evans,” taunts Rosier nastily.

“What do you want Rosy,” sneered Lily as she looked warily from Rosier to Wilkes, then Avery and finally Severus.

Severus didn’t even hear Rosier’s response though it must have been biting judging from the flames flashing in his eyes. Severus was too busy feeling guilty at his spineless aversion to his friend’s teasing. How could he, in a moment of insecurity, put the focus onto Lily? How was he going to get her out of this mess?

“I’m meeting someone, if you must know,” said Lily scathingly, her emerald orbs pleading with Severus to rescue her. “Severus…”

Snapping his head angrily Severus’ obsidian eyes bore into Lily’s frightened gaze.
“S-e-v-e-r-u-s does not associate with filthy Gryffindors.” His voice was iron, hard and stabbing.

A single tear fell down Lily’s cheek and regret pained his chest but Severus could see no other recourse. A brisk movement rustled the leaves of the bushes nearby, making him believe that Lord Voldemort’s spies were watching the action unfold. To save her now, he must continue to berate her.

Severus advanced on Lily like a panther to his prey. He kept his expression cold, his eyes blank. Seizing both arms roughly behind her back, he pressed her into his body as they both continued to face the group of menacing boys. She trembled in his arms and every aspect of morality that was in him was screaming to embrace her lovingly, to shield her from the inevitable onslaught of torture that was sure to come, but he remained steadfast.

Severus yanked Lily’s arms tighter behind her back. She stifled a scream and stopped struggling to free herself. His friends assaulted her verbally, poking her viciously with well aimed stinging hexes. Large welts began to swell over the exposed places of her neck and face.
“I’m sorry Lil,” whispered Severus as he felt her go limp in his arms seemingly from the pain of her injuries.

“Expelliarmus!”

All three boys lost their wands as they flew from their grasp. Spinning around quickly they were met by the angry stares of Remus, Sirus, Peter and James.

The next thing Severus knew his friends were laying stunned on the ground, the snow soaking into their coats. He, on the other hand had Lily cradled in his arms.
“PUT HER DOWN!” Ordered James between clenched teeth, his wand pointed meaningfully at Severus’ head.

“Right, just drop her then?” Asks Severus casually as he inched backwards trying to put some distance between himself and James’ gang.

“SO HELP ME, IF YOU’VE HURT HER I’LL…” James could hardly contain his rage and his wand quivered with emotion.

“You’ll do what exactly?” scoffs Snape. “You wouldn’t dare curse me now, not while she lies helplessly in my arms between us. You won’t do anything to harm her will you?”

“Snape,” said Remus calmly. “Just put her down gently and walk away. You can’t win here.”

Severus thought for a moment. If he concedes, he admits defeat. Then again, glancing at his comrades lying motionless in the snow, he is all alone with no back up. Slowly Severus lowers Lily to the ground and backs away, keeping his eyes fixed on James the whole time.

Reaching the tuft of bushes behind him, Severus burns with envy as James swiftly lifts Lily gracefully into his arms, murmuring into her hair.

Looking up briefly James mutters loudly, “This isn’t over Snivellus.”

“So it begins,” replies Severus bitingly.

-X-____________________

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~nevillesgirl

CHAPTER 6
DISASTERS AND MIRACLES

Lily spent two days in the hospital wing with Madam Pomfrey hovering protectively around, restricting her visitors and activities. Severus tried several times to gain access to the hospital but on each occasion either Potter or one of his friends showed up. It was almost as if they were following him, intentionally preventing him form seeing Lily.

Tonight Severus was roaming the corridors as he often did when bouts of insomnia struck. He decided to try and visit Lily. It should have been perfect. Everyone was supposed to have been confined to their respective dormitories and the hospital wing was restricted to students after curfew.

Rounding the third floor and nearing the door, Severus suddenly heard a slight cough behind him. Remus Lupin stepped silently from the shadows of the armor gallery and motioned for Severus to follow him. Severus groaned inwardly as they climbed several changing staircases to the seventh floor. Ickle prefect Lupin was taking him to the Headmaster’s office.

"Licorice Wand," said Lupin and the massive stone gargoyle jumped aside revealing a narrow, spiral staircase.
Tensions sparked when Remus stepped beside Severus as the staircase began to ascend. Severus saw Remus open his mouth as if to speak but then closed it as if he thought better of the idea. Remus knocked three times with the big, brass griffin doorknocker and waited. Muddled voices silenced quickly as the door opened and Professor Dumbledore waved them in.

“Sorry to bother you at this late hour Sir,” started Lupin apologetically. “But Snape was out after curfew…near the hospital.”

“Thank you Mr. Lupin. You may retire for the evening.” Professor Dumbledore waited for Remus to close the door behind him then turned his pale blue eyes upon Severus.

Leaning back against his ornately decorated high-back chair, Professor Dumbledore clasped his gangly fingers together in his lap. Neither spoke. Severus got the distinct impression the Headmaster was trying to read his mind. Flooding his mind with the most mundane thought possible, he recalled the days History of Magic lesson and Professor Binn’s droll voice.

“Extraordinary control Mr. Snape,” said Professor Dumbledore in surprise. “When did you begin learning Occlumency?”

“Occlu—what, Sir?” Asked Snape curiously.

Pausing slightly, Professor Dumbledore shook his head. “Never mind, tell me Severus, what where you doing milling about the corridors at this time of night and so near the hospital?”

Dumbledore looked at Severus from over his half-moon spectacles and waited patiently.

“I usually go for a walk when I have insomnia. I just ended up at the hospital Sir.”

“You must understand Severus, that the circumstances do seem somewhat suspicious considering your recent history concerning Ms. Evans.”

Severus looked past Professor Dumbledore to the shelf on the back wall where the sorting hat lay still. Next to it a ruby-crusted sword glinted in the glow of the candlelight. Sighing loudly Severus hoped Professor Dumbledore released him soon.

Seeming to understand Dumbledore stood and swished his long blue billowing robes around his cherry wood desk. “One more thing before you leave,” he said softly. “I wish you to begin private lessons with me starting a week from now after your final detention.”

“Private lessons, Sir?” Inquired Severus, his eyebrows furrowed slightly.

“I will inform you of the nature of these lessons during our first session,” Professor Dumbledore said simply. “Good evening Severus.”

“Good evening Professor.”
-X-

The first opportunity Severus had to see Lily was in Potions class the next day. It wasn’t much of an opportunity though since every fifth year Gryffindor seemed to be surrounding her protectively.

Severus enters the gloomy dungeon and walks briskly to his seat at the front of the class next to Professor Slughorn’s desk. Avery and Rosier were already seated, their heads together, shooting malevolent glances over to where James and Sirius sat behind Lily’s desk.

As Severus took his seat between Avery and Rosier, he chanced a look over at Lily. Her usually sparkling emerald eyes were dark with anger as she boldly stared back at him. The connection lasted only a moment but felt like an eternity. When Lily averted her gaze and started a low conversation with her girlfriends Alice and Calliope, Severus felt his heart freeze instantly. It’s as if a fierce blizzard moved into his chest. The pain was overwhelming.

He deserved it. Her reaction was sensible of course, after the way he dismissed her as invisible. It was more then that though, and Severus knew it. He didn’t stand up for her, protect her, or cherish her; all the things a boyfriend is supposed to do.

“Man,” grumbles Avery in a harsh whisper. “Filch has gone too far. If I have to serve one more detention cleaning toilets in the second floor bathroom listening to Moaning Myrtle moan all night, I’m going to kill myself!”

“I don’t know what you’re complaining about Avery,” sneers Rosier viciously. “At least you are inside the castle. That giant fur ball Hagrid has me raking leaves in the Forbidden Forest. It’s so cold; I nearly got frost bite in my fingers.”
Rosier shoved Avery his slightly bandaged hands with lightly tinged purple extremities protruding from the gauze. “And I can’t use any magic. It’s disgraceful; like a common servant.”

“Hey Sev, you never told us what your detention is,” said Avery.

Severus hesitated briefly, casting a fervent glance around. His task was so demeaning; he didn’t want to be overheard. “I’m the Quidditch Boy until after Saturdays match,” he said quietly.

“Are you serious,” asks Rosier, stifling a chuckle. “You hate Quidditch and now you’re cleaning up after each house after their practice sessions? Terrible.”

“Yeah, I even have to take the fliers stinky robes down to the laundry for the house elves to wash. It’s disgusting,” said Severus, wrinkling his nose.

“Attention class,” boomed Professor Slughorn as he bounced jauntily through the door. “Today we will be starting Beautification Potions.”

“Need all the help you can get eh, Pettigrew?” scoffs Wilkes from the desk behind Severus. Vespa Crouch covers her mouth to hide her smirk.

“That is quite enough Mr. Wilkes,” said Slughorn sternly.

Taking notice of the whispers going on in each corner of the room, Professor Slughorn leaned against his desk and addressed the class.
“I can see we are all somewhat distracted today. The situation will have to be remedied of course. Alice will you please join Mr. Longbottom next to Mr. Wilkes. Calliope and Sirius, will you please make room for Mr. Rosier. Avery, please situate next to Mr. Potter and Miss Evans. Let me see…Mr. Lupin over here next to Severus and Vespa.”

Despite the groans, chairs scooted back and scruffy sneakers trudged across the dungeon floor getting each person to their respective seats.

Severus was so preoccupied with James Potter and his nearness to Lily that he missed the directions for beginning his Beautification Potion. Vespa Crouch gently grazed his hand as she reached across the table for the stirring stick. Reluctantly tearing his eyes from Lily and James, Severus busied himself getting the fire started.

Suddenly there was a shout as Vespa’s left sleeve caught fire. The blaze spread quickly, engulfing her sleeve up to her elbow.

“Aguamenti!” Streams of water sprang form Severus’ and Lupin’s wand tips, extinguishing the flames. Massive blisters rose immediately on Vespa’s forearm.

“Hospital wing Ms. Crouch,” said Professor Slughorn hastily.

“NO!” shouted Severus. “There’s no time!”
A chant escaped his lips, almost as if by accident. The thick accent of an ancient tongue commanded power and healing. Severus ran his wand over the length of Vespa’s wounds and almost as suddenly as the blisters sprang up, they began to subside.

A stunned silence filled the room as everyone gapped at Severus. Eyes widened in surprise and bewilderment continued to look at him as he began to bandage the affected area on Vespa’s arm.

“How…Severus you…” Professor Slughorn sputters, clearly at a loss for words. “Vespa, please show yourself to the hospital wing.”

“Thank you Severus,” said Vespa shyly and she placed a soft kiss on his cheek and turned toward the dungeon doors.

Several things happened at that point. Wolf whistles and cat-calls leered at Severus from most of the Students. Severus could see however, the fury in Lily’s eyes and the flask of peppermint extract explode unexpectedly on her desk. Among the river of laughter and teasing in the room, James rushed to clean the splattered liquid as it ran down the desk and on to Lily’s leg. Now it was Severus’ turn to narrow his obsidian eyes in anger.

Remus Lupin looked from Lily to Severus, his brow furrowed, taking in the exchange that just happened.
-X-
**It's a little long. Sorry about that. Lots going on in this chapter.
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~nevillesgirl

**Thank you to everyone who is reading this fic. Some instructions for this chapter. The letter to Lily is in code. The instructions are in the story. If you can figure it out, send me the decoded message via PM. I will publicly acknowledge your accomplishment in the feedback thread. Good Luck.

CHAPTER 7
INTERNAL EXPOSURE

Severus leaned against the book shelf in the far corner of the Library. A tattered old text book with brown edges lay open propped up against his knees. He wrote furiously glancing up every once in awhile to make sure he was alone, and then continued scribbling rapidly. He had two hours before he needed to be at the Quidditch Pitch for detention and he wanted to be half-way finished with his essay on Beautification Potions. He had other plans for his time of research tonight and it had nothing to do with beauty and everything to do with revenge.

James Potter and his brood of semi-talented misfits were going to pay. Severus looked at the page at a four syllable word and wrote the phrase 'For Enemies' underneath it. When he was done modifying it, this word ,whatever the incantation turned out to be, would leave more then an annoying little paper cut scratch.

Sirius and James had publicly ridiculed him at the end of Potions asking if he regularly crooned in a sing-song voice to his girlfriend. Of course everyone laughed; everyone except Slughorn, Lupin and Lily. Severus certainly had no intention of broadcasting his capabilities for such advanced magic to the entire class, but neither could he let Vespa lose the use of her arm. Luckily for him only these three seemed to notice and Severus was pretty sure he could trust two out of the three…if he could only get Lily talking to him again.

Folding his unfinished essay and storing it in his book bag, Severus reaches for a clean parchment. There was no use trying to concentrate on homework now, not when things needed to be resolved with Lily.

believe I Please no choice. had Dark one The the power with recruiting me. is affections for My now places you in grave you danger. remain must It secret! my cowardice Forgive until I but come up can a better with solution, the course. stay

veS

It was a primitive muggle code game he and Lily used to play as children. By taking the first word of each sentence and moving it to the third place, the message became annoying to decipher. Folding the parchment quickly and writing ‘Queen Bee’ on the front, Severus took out his wand and waved it over the note. Whispering Lily’s name, the parchment floated from Severus’ fingers and out the window up towards Gryffindor Tower.

“You love her don’t you,” Inquired a quiet voice from the next aisle.

Whirling about and peering through mounds of books, Severus saw the sinewy form of Remus Lupin sitting in the dark with only his wand tip illuminating the space around him.

“How much did you see,” asks Severus curtly through clenched teeth?

“Enough to ascertain that note is probably finding its way to Lily as we speak,” said Remus softly.

Severus laughed wickedly. “You’re reaching, Lupin. Being a prefect seems to have given you an over inflated sense of intelligence.”

“Has it now,” whispers Lupin harshly. “I have eyes Severus. I saw the fire barely restrained behind your eyes during potions today. I saw your chest heaving as you gasped for the breath that anger stole from you as you observed James being so attentive to her.”

“You’re mental!” seethed Snape, curious though as to how Remus calculated correctly the emotion concealed within the core of his soul.

Lupin rounded the bookcase with speed, pushing his face close to Severus and grasped the front of his robes with both fists. His eyes were flashing, revealing anguish, humiliation and longing. His words were laced in torment, spitting pain as each syllable escapes his lips against his will.

“She is kind and gentle. She sees the best in people and brings out their greatest potential. She cares not for what others think and is always looking after the interest of others.” Remus paused, his breathing ragged and raspy.

Severus stared in astonishment at this man before him. It was like looking into a mirror at an animal crazed with jealousy and yearning. He understood then the perceptiveness of Remus. Remus sees sympathetically what he feels; what he hides. Lupin was in love with Lily.

Releasing Severus, Remus slowly backs away. “Yes, I too love Lily Evans. Like you, I have to endure the agony of James, my best friend no less, being in love with her as well. I will not risk my friendship with James over a woman so I keep my feelings hidden; buried deep within the pit of my soul, yet I die a bit more everyday."

Severus regards Remus with interest. His pallor was indeed sallow and pale. Dark circles puffed in bags around his calm eyes. His physique though lean and muscular seemed over tired and run-down. He didn’t look well.

“The funny thing is I though I saw…” Remus gasped suddenly his eyes wide. “Lily is just as in love with you as you are with her. OH—My—Gosh! Are you two…”

Remus didn’t get a chance to finish his question. Severus shoved him roughly against the bookcase, his wand jabbed maliciously under his chin.
“Don’t—say—another—word!” Struggling for control, Severus continued. “It is imperative that this remains just between you, me and Lily. You know the Dark Forces are gaining power.”

“But what does that have to do with your relationship?”

“Use your common sense Remus,” hushed Severus. “Lily is muggleborn remember?”

Comprehension dawned gracefully across Remus’ face and he nodded his head in agreement. “Yes, it would be best for Lily if this never got out.”

“Good, now if you don’t mind Lupin, I must take my leave.”

Gathering his books, Severus stalked out of the semi-abandoned Library leaving a confused and crestfallen Lupin staring after him.-X-
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~nevillesgirl

CHAPTER 8
PROVE YOUR WORTH

Severus sat in his favorite squishy armchair near the common room fireplace trying to warm the chill in his bones. He had gotten caught in a windstorm as he was pushing the cart loaded with dirty Quidditch robes to the laundry room. His shoulder length ebony hair was strewn around his face in a mass of tangles and his teeth were chattering. Severus felt like an ice cube.

The sound of the wind howling fiercely was somewhat muddled form the water of the lake above.

"Accio book."

Severus pointed his wand toward the dormitories and summoned his Advanced Potions book. Well it wasn’t really his. It had belonged to his mother when she was at Hogwarts years ago. It wasn’t a required text until year six but Severus had always managed to find some use for it.

The pages were brown and tattered. There were millions of smudges and cross out marks between the covers. Severus loved to improve upon the potions that were written here already. He found the author somewhat lacking in any creativity of the potions he was attempting to teach.

Contemplating his latest discovery, Severus drew a line through the phrase One Strand Finely Chopped Unicorn Tail, and replaced it with Burn One Strand Unicorn Tail to Ash. It took him completely by surprise when he learned that by adding the unicorn tail in ash form to the rest of the ingredients of a Hate Potion, it strengthened the effects of the potion greatly.

Severus was anxiously anticipating the result he got from this potion. In particular, he was looking forward to every fault and every annoying habit that James Potter ever had being exposed to the one person that matters most to him. It was difficult to find a Hate Potion that didn’t cause someone to hate another. This type of Hate Potion was given to someone by someone who hates them. The vilest form of magic is pouring one’s own loathing into another, effectively forcing them to behave in a most unbecoming manor.

Severus grins wickedly as he stares down at this new composition. He could hardly wait to experiment with it on Potter.

The soft embers of the fire crackled.

“Severus.”

Looking up, Severus saw Lucius Malfoy’s head protruding among the glowing coals.

“Lucius, what brings you here at this hour?” Asks Severus innocently.
Somehow he knew the answer before a word escapes Lucius’ lips.

“The reports given to the Dark Lord concerning your escapades in Hogsmeade and also your…ahh, talents in Potions class have been intriguing to say the least.”

Severus’ eyes narrow slightly. How would Voldemort know what happened in Potions?

“The Dark Lord,” continues Lucius, his voice slippery with meaning, “seeks and audience with you. He wishes you to prove your abilities.”

“Lucius, perhaps you can explain to me why I am being requested to prove my abilities especially if Voldemort is getting reports about them?”

Lucius hissed angrily. "Do not speak the Dark Lord’s name! Even I am not worthy to speak it!” Severus bows apologetically and Lucius continues. “Surely you must understand that among his followers you would not be a welcome addition, especially if you are as talented as the spies reported.”

It occurs to Severus that there are opposing forces speaking out against him. This might be just the out he is looking for. If Voldemort finds him not up to snuff, he would stop recruiting him and that would lessen the danger surrounding Lily. However Severus recalls that Voldemort’s power is almost unmatched and he can always tell when someone is lying to him. If Severus intentionally flubs his task and he is discovered, Voldemort will likely kill him. Voldemort kills any who oppose or attempt to hoodwink him. Seeing no way out, Severus addresses Lucius.

“What must I do Lucius?” Asks Severus confidently.

“The Forbidden Forest awaits you and your task at hand. Be there in one hour.”

-X-

At ten minutes to midnight Severus quietly slips from his canopy bed and bundles in layers. He can’t believe that he must venture back outdoors after finally getting warm.
The room is unusually quiet. Avery must be exhausted after his detention with Hagrid tonight. He seems too tired to even put for the effort to snore.

Wrapping his black and green Slytherin scarf snuggly about his neck, Severus makes for the common room porthole. It doesn’t take him long to reach the grounds. The blustery wind whips Severus’ hair into a tangled frenzy and he wishes he had taken a moment to tie it back. The wailing gusts drown out the sound of crunching sticks and dead leaves as Severus walked keenly deep into the dark forest. The light of the full moon illuminates his steps. Off in the distance, a faint glow beckons Severus forward. As he progresses slowly, the trees seem to thicken, offering concealment and protection from unwanted intruders. Approaching closer, Severus realizes the faint glow is actually two stone shaped alters each with a roaring fire and cauldron. They sit about waist high in the middle of a small clearing encompassed by a circle of candles. As the wind blows violently around, the circle remains eerily calm.

The audience is small; five figures hooded and masked with their wands hanging limply at their sides. A man and woman stand supremely in front of them. The man is impressive, not in stature but in aura. He commands a presence about him though he is somewhat skinny. His long thin fingers move gracefully like a spider. His eyes glow a violent shade of red, giving him a distinctly evil appearance.

Severus shifts his gaze to the woman. She looks vaguely familiar. Her tight spiral curls were pinned up in an unruly manner revealing tiny lines around the corner of her eyes. Though somewhat petite in stature the hard glint in her eyes give the appearance of strength and power.

“Severus Snape, at last we finally meet.” The man’s voice oozes softly through is yellowing teeth. “Tales of your aptitude in potion making and the Dark Arts have reached my ears. No doubt you are very curious as to why you have been summoned.”

Severus remains quiet. Something told him to interrupt or question this man would be disastrous.

“To my faithful followers,” the man motions to the dark hooded figures, “I am known as the Dark Lord. It is a name held in reserve for their use only. To the rest of the world I am known as Death, destruction and power; also known as Voldemort.

Voldemort put his pale hand on Severus’ shoulder and guides him to one of the cauldrons. The woman follows swiftly behind.
“I wish to conduct an experiment, if you will,” said Voldemort. “You see, I have heard of your brilliance at potion making and considering your age, I simply could not believe it. A contest then, is what I desire, between my most loyal follower Bellatrix and yourself.”

Severus looks over at Bellatrix coolly. Now he remembers her. She was at Hogwarts during his first year. At least he saw her in the common room a couple of times. Whether or not she was a student, he knows not. Bellatrix positions herself behind her cauldron. Following her lead, Severus takes his place behind the other.

“I wish for you to concoct a potion using just the ingredients found in the forest. It is your choice as to which potion you will produce. Results must be flawless. Begin.”

Severus smiles slyly as he looked over to where Bellatrix was coaxing the flames of her fire into a high ball of energy. He knew every herb, bark and potential ingredient in this forest. There were only three possible potions that could be completed with the ingredients that could be found here. Gathering his robes, Severus made for the West edge of the forest for the small colony of Adder snakes that typically bred there.

-X-

Dawn was approaching when Severus finally stepped back from his cauldron content that his Blood Replenishing Potion was brewed to perfection. His potion was emitting a soft green stream of smoke and a pleasant pine smell. For extra measure Severus added a sprig of mint to counter the harsh taste that would be left by the snake venom.

Bellatrix, looked confounded as her cauldron was bubbling fiercely and emitting sharp blue sparks from its mouth. Severus grins knowing that in her haste to finish first, Bellatrix had brewed her potion over a fire that was much too hot. Whatever potion she had brewed over there, Severus wouldn’t give it to a dead rat for fear of killing it twice.

“The basic composition is that of a Blood Replenishing Potion is it not Mr. Snape,” Asks Voldemort in a whisper.

“Yes Sir,” replied Severus confidently.

“And the potion can be changed to suit which type of venom you use?”

Severus nodded.

“Evanesco,” said Voldemort looking harshly over to where Bellatrix was standing. Both cauldrons and their contents clear away instantly. “It seems my dear Bella, that you have been bested by a fifth year student.”

“But my Lord, these ingredients were so primitive…”

“Are we debating this point Bella?” inquired Voldemort, his voice razor sharp.

“No master,” whimpered Bellatrix obediently.

Voldemort turned to his small group of followers and beckoned a tall gangly figure forward. “Excellent perception of your classmate Avery; It will be your responsibility to keep me informed of his progress at Hogwarts.”

“Yes my Lord,” said Avery.

Voldemort snaps his fingers and his brood of followers traipsed after him as he is swallowed by the darkness of the forest.

Avery punched Severus playfully in the shoulder as he removed his skeletal mask. “Good job man. I knew you were good but I had no idea you were that good.”

Severus raised his eyebrows quizzically at his friend. As the two boys walked towards the castle, Avery explained how he became a follower of Voldemort; a Death Eater, and what his role was. Avery also explained that Severus was now in a state of observation. This stage could last a couple of years. It is to ensure that Voldemort doesn’t choose his followers lightly explains Avery.

Approaching the castle door, Severus turned to survey the grounds. The sun was threatening to break free from its slumber. A movement over near the Whomping Willow caught Severus’ eye. Actually it was the lack of movement that caught his attention. James, Remus and Sirius wee emerging from the base of the volatile tree yet the branches were immobile and the boys seemed unharmed.

Severus and Avery scurried quickly out of sight not wanting to be found witnessing such a strange event. Little did he know that bright green eyes had witnessed the secretive emergence from the Forbidden Forest through her window in Gryffindor tower.
-X-

Okay, thanks for being patient. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Leave your FEEDBACK HERE
~nevillesgirl

CHAPTER 9
REUNITED

Two days later Severus made his way down to Professor Slughorn’s classroom. He had skived off lunch in the hope that he would have at least forty-five minutes to experiment with his Hate Potion. Noticing a faint glow coming from beneath the threshold, Severus frowns. Someone was in there; probably some asinine first year in need of remedial potions. In his frustration Severus kicks open the heavy door. The sound of a crashing cauldron and vulgar language fill Severus’ ears.

“Damn half-wit!” Lily Evans hurried to clear her overturned potion before it spread all over the floor.

“Lily, what are you doing here,” asks Severus with bewilderment on his harsh features.

“Hmmm, let me think,” Said Lily derisively, “I was putting on nail polish. What do you think I am doing?”

Lily walked to the other side of the classroom and started putting away the mound of books and potions ingredients. “I am not speaking to you.”

“C’mon Lil, I explained everything in my letter. You did get my letter right?” Severus closed the door to the dungeon. He made an attempt to assist Lily in cleaning her mess when she stopped him.

“I don’t want nor do I need your help Severus.” Her words were like venom, deadly and sharp. She whirled on him then. In a spontaneous flare of emotion she attacked him. “Who are you Severus Snape? What happened to the kind, concerned intelligent boy I used to know? Where is the boy I fell in love with?”

Severus stared at Lily astounded by her declaration. Then the rest of her words rushed over him like a tidal wave drenching him in anger. “What do you mean intelligent? Am I not clever suddenly?”

“Okay Severus, answer me this if you can. Why were you coming out of the Forbidden Forest at dawn two nights ago with Avery?” Lily stared stonily at him unflinching, daring him to respond. When none was forthcoming, she shoved him violently in the chest with both hands.

Quickly Severus grabs her wrists vice-like refusing to release her even amidst her wild protests.

“Silent and secretive, both two very becoming qualities in a relationship wouldn’t you say,” said Lily sarcastically.

Lily was on fire. Her eyes were shooting daggers and her skin was boiling with heat. Severus had never seen her so passionate; so beautiful. He fought the urge rising from his toes racing up his legs and settling unchained in the pit of his stomach to devour her lips with his own. His desire was ravenous as he soaked her in. Her red hair spread provocatively, fanning her shoulders and resting lightly atop her bosom. Her creamy skin flushed pink with anger. The muscle in her jaw flexed as she clenched her teeth tightly. Lily’s breathing was ragged and heavy and resounding in his ears. Severus’ mind was spinning. Lily was intoxicating. She was all manner of witch and he was under her spell.

As she struggled, Severus pulled her toward him effortlessly. With her wrists still in his grip, Severus pressed her against his torso and held her hands behind her back. He was drowning in a deep green sea as she looked up at him with her almond-shaped emerald eyes. Breathing deeply he could smell the fresh jasmine scent of her shampoo. Her breath tickled his chin, coaxing his lips to hers.

“Don’t you understand Lily, that I need you?” His voice was barely an audible whisper but it seemed to thunder in the quiet dungeon. “You are to me like the air I breathe each day. You give me life. You are the stabilizing force in my chaotic world. Without you I don’t know what I’m capable of.”

He kissed her then, crushing his mouth to hers, devouring her lips like a man deprived of food. Severus felt Lily relax in his embrace and releases her hands, wrapping his arms about her waist. Her hands stole confidently to his thick black hair pulling him deeper into the kiss. After what seemed like an eternity, they released each other.

“I’ve missed you Sev,” said Lily shyly.

“And I you,” began Severus. “I need to know if you understand why our relationship must remain secret.”

“The Evil Wizard has noticed your power,” said Lily calmly.

“Yes,” said Severus, “if he found out that I am in a relationship with a muggle, he may attempt to hurt you.”

“Just tell him you aren’t interested,” said Lily wryly.

Severus turned and walked toward the bookcase fingering the ancient books carefully. “One does not oppose this wizard Lily,” said Severus quietly. “He murders those who do. Until I can figure this out, I’m trapped.”

Lily walked toward Severus, her hand outstretched to comfort him when she heard a silky voice behind her.

“What are you planning to do Lily, jinx him while his back is turned?”

Whirling around, Lily narrows her eyes at Vespa Crouch, who is standing in the door way, her arms crossed defiantly in front of her.

“No Vespa, actually I was playing at being helpless and pathetic so he would feel pity and rescue Me.” retorts Lily meanly. “Oh wait, you’ve already done that.”

Looking back at Severus, Lily gives him a sly wink. “Slug Club meeting…don’t forget.” Without another word she brushes past Vespa leaving Severus smirking after her.

Vespa was so busy seething after Lily that she didn’t notice Severus suddenly standing beside her.

“Ahem, how are your burns Vespa,” asks Severus politely.

“Better thanks to you,” said Vespa, lowering her eyes demurely. “The Headmaster asked me to give you this.”

She pulled out a neatly folded parchment and handed it to Severus, her fingertips lingering in the palm of his hand.

“Uh, thanks. I should go…” said Severus, waving the letter casually in front of him.

Back in his room Severus opened the note.


-X-
****************
Sorry it's a bit short. Hopefully the later chaps will make up for it.
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CHAPTER 10
LESSONS LEARNED

At five minutes to six thirty, Severus makes his way to the seventh floor. He hated being up here without his friends. A lone Slytherin walking past the Gryffindor common room porthole was an easy mark indeed. Perhaps just this once he would escape unscathed. Severus suddenly stumbled awkwardly, arms flailing to the sides and landed face first with a thud.

“Trip Jinx Snivillus,” sneers Sirius Black while James Potter laughs cruelly beside him.

Severus curses under his breath and attempts to grasp his wand from his robe pocket when James yells, “Petrificus Totalus!”

Severus went rigid, his eyes stealing left to right. In his immobile state, he began to panic.

James and Sirius grabbed Severus by the ankles and dragged him behind a large stone pillar. Together they kicked and punched him mercilessly until blood spurt from his nose and his lip swelled to the size of a garden slug.

“If you ever go near Lily again, with the intent to harm her,” hisses James angrily in Severus’ ear, “I will kill you!”

Lifting the full body bind, Sirius and James left Severus behind the column barely conscious.

Severus awoke to the mellow murmurings of what he believed to be a gathering of people around him. At first he thought he was in the hospital wing and groaned inwardly at the thought of Madam Pomfrey hovering protectively over him. His left eye was swollen and he struggled to see out of the narrow-slit opening. Severus fought to sit upright, pushing up clumsily and leaned against a plump red velvet pillow.

“Ah you are awake, excellent,” said a gentle voice.

Professor Dumbledore busied himself conjuring teacups, saucers and a kettle. Then he moved over to the cushy red sofa and began to fluff the pillows. Severus opened his mouth to speak but Professor Dumbledore cut him off.
“Hold still Severus. I would like to mend you nose and clean the bloodstains off of your face.”

Pointing his wand at Severus, Dumbledore spoke and a soft crunch had Severus’ nose fitting itself back into place and the dry, crusty blood disappearing from his chin and robe.

“I am afraid that the swelling around your eye and lip will decrease in a couple of days on its own.”

“Professor, do we still have time for our lesson,” Severus asks with interest.

“Perhaps you should recover before we delve into the intensity of the lesson I have planned for you,” said Professor Dumbledore with concern.

“If it is all the same to you sir, I would very much like to begin tonight.”

Professor Dumbledore raised his eyebrow at the determination registered in Severus’ voice.
“Very well,” said Professor Dumbledore and flicked his wand casually.

The comfortable couch and tea set disappeared and Severus found himself sitting on a large high-back chair.

“What I wish to teach you Severus is an obscure branch of magic known as Occlumency. Occlumency is the art of being able to protect ones own thoughts from outside intrusion. Upon our last visit, I sensed in you the natural ability to control who you allow to invade you thoughts. I was surprised to discover Severus, that you possess the innate ability to develop this branch of magic and master it fully.”

Severus looked at the Headmaster, dumbfounded. “You…are you telling me that you…you can read my mind?” Severus sputters this question with a mixture of emotions ranging from rage to mere curiosity.

Seeing the internal struggle wildly churning within Severus, Dumbledore speaks to reassure him. “It is complicated to explain. One cannot simply just force there way into someone’s mind. Eye contact is vital. This branch of magic is called Legilimency. It is used in conjunction with Occlumency.”

Dumbledore leans gracefully against his desk and contemplates Severus’ stiffness. “If you are willing, I would like to teach you to arm yourself properly against an external mind invasion.”

“And Legilimency Sir,” inquires Severus eagerly.

“Once you have mastered Occlumency, I will instruct you in Legilimency.” Dumbledore pauses, nodding at Severus then continues. “Your first bit of homework will be to concentrate on emptying your mind each time you are around James Potter, his friends and especially Lily Evans.”

-X-

Severus stepped from the staircase that led to the Headmaster’s Office distractedly. He scratched his temple wondering what possible good could come of emptying his thoughts around Potter and his friends. Even more curious was the fact that he must also practice this while around Lily.

Rounding the same stone pillar in which Potter and Black had attacked him, Severus slows his steps. Angry shouts could be heard in the deserted corridor from somewhere up ahead. Ducking quickly behind the pillar, Severus pokes his head out interested in seeing who it was making all that noise. It was Lily and she was fuming at James Potter.

“You arrogant sack of stink sap, how dare you presume to know anything about me. I can take care of myself and certainly do not need a personal escort from you or your pathetic friends!”

James ran his fingers through his already rumpled hair and looks at Lily cockily.
“Just go out with me then, and I won’t have the need to feel…responsible for your safety.”

“You, responsible, you must be joking,” snaps Lily as she shoves James out of her personal space.

“You really should take care not to get into situations where Snivillus can accost you. I may not always be around to save your hide.” James looks at Lily appreciatively and lets out a short whistle.

“How dare you call him that, you filthy bullying toerag! Do you feel superior picking on people? I think what you and Black did to him tonight was despicable!”

Severus rolls his eyes. Lily was getting worked up. James was in for an earful.
She was defending him again. Severus hated that. Lily’s voice brought Severus back to reality.

“He’s intelligent, gentle and kind and I lo…”

“STUPEFY!”

A voice pierced the darkness and all was quiet.

-X-

**gasp**who in heck is that! Please leave your FEEDBACK HERE
Thanks for reading!
~nevillesgirl

CHAPTER 11
EXCITING NEWS!

Severus’ breath caught like a lump in his throat. Oh gosh, he thought. Lily. Forgetting that he was alone in a very Gryffindor area of the castle, Severus left the safety of his hiding place. All he could think about was Lily.

Then Severus saw her. Lily’s hands were shaking as they covered her mouth in awe. James Potter was falling backwards stunned, revealing a serious-looking Remus Lupin concealed behind him.

“Lupin, what have you done,” Lily asks.

Remus looks from Lily to Severus, then back to Lily again. “I am sorry to frighten you Lily, but I must beg you not to make such bold declarations about ah, the man you love in such a public fashion.”

“What?” Lily looked thoroughly confused by Lupin’s words.

“Lily dear,” began Severus quietly, “Lupin is right. You must be more careful about how you defend me.”

Lily shook her head, flabbergasted at this new and unexpected development. “Remus, do you know whom I was speaking about?”

Severus noticed Remus wince at the obvious emotion in Lily’s voice. “Yes. Severus. We dare not continue this discussion now. James will be waking soon. Severus, you show go.”

Severus turned and faced Lily. Although he hated what Lupin was suggesting, he was also right. “Keep it secret,” he said, and then Severus sprinted down the corridor and out of sight.
-X-

The Great Hall was buzzing with excitement as Severus, Avery, Rosier and Wilkes made their way across the room to the Slytherin table for breakfast.

The signs had gone up overnight and were plastered over every inch of the massive hall.

Masquerade Ball
All Hallows Eve
630p-1100p
Dress Robes Required



Severus’ eyes immediately searched for Lily. Her red flame hair was gleaming in the morning sunlight that poured in from the windows. She was talking animatedly to her friends Alice and Calliope. As if sensing his gaze upon her Lily looked up and met his eyes. She smiled widely at him; her cheeks flushed pink with anticipation of the upcoming dance. Severus returned her smile slightly and shook his head from side-to- Lily yet again but surely she could understand that it was impossible for them to go to the Ball together.

“So Sev, are you going to ask Vespa to the Ball?” Asks Avery curiously.

“Um, I’m not sure about that mate,” replies Severus nonchalantly. “I was thinking of keeping my options open.”

“I fink we fould all stag it, maybe fause a fit of mayhem.” Rosier’s mouth was stuffed full of a ham and cheese omelet that tiny sprays of food flew from his mouth as he spoke.

Wilkes shoved him backwards off the bench. “Gross man, I have egg particles on my arm!”

Rosier righted himself and chewed his food furiously, chasing it down with a spot of Pumpkin Juice. “Sorry,” he said apologetically. “I was saying we should all go stag so we can cause a bit of mayhem perhaps.”

“Excellent idea,” said Severus. “Can I assume our intended target is Potter and his flunkies?” When Rosier nods his head in agreement, Severus continues. “Since we all have a huge amount of homework due to our O.W.L.S, I suggest we only focus on two and develop a plan against them. How about Potter and Black?”

The boys continued to discuss and develop their plan for the dance on Halloween. They have two weeks to prepare for every possible quandary that could occur that night. As Severus bit into his buttered English muffin, he thought about another problem he must solve; how to keep Lily safe during the plan. Severus scowled into his coffee cup. If he knew Potter, the braggart would be insistent upon staying as close to Lily as possible. The thought sickened him.

It was time to enlist the assistance of an unlikely ally. He would speak to Remus Lupin during Potions today.
-X-

It was convenient that Vespa was at the hospital wing getting a final clearance to return to Potions class by Madam Pomfrey. It gave Severus the opportunity to talk to Lupin.

Remus walked in and took his seat next to Severus, grim faced.

Severus tapped his wand on a piece of parchment and suddenly the words appeared.

Potter ticked?

Remus shook his head ‘yes’ and tapped the parchment.

He thinks it was you.

Severus tapped the parchment again.

Need a favor. Ask Lily to the Ball. Explain why I can’t take her. Keep her away from Potter. I will contact you about your attire in the future.
Remus raised his eyebrow inquisitively, but nodded. As soon as Lily walked in, Remus left Severus and took her aside. They conversed in hush whispers. Severus wasn’t the only one interested in their conversation. James Potter stopped fooling around with Sirius and starred at Remus and haughtily.

After a few minutes, Lily nodded her head and planted a quick, perfunctory kiss upon Remus’ cheek.

Blushing scarlet, Remus returned to his seat besides Severus.

Tapping the parchment impatiently with his wand, Severus inquired what had happened. Remus tapped back and his words appeared.

Explained why you wanted me to take her-to keep James away from her. Kiss was to tick James off…sorry.
Just then Vespa Crouch entered the classroom followed by Professor Slughorn and the lesson was started for the day.

-X_

**Sorry this is way short but I promise the next two chaps are a bit longer.

Please Leave Your FEEDBACK HERE

CHAPTER 12
BEFORE THE BALL

The weeks leading up to Halloween were riddled with frustrations. The amount of homework that the students were given was outrageous. On top of that, Severus and his friends were busy working out the details of their revenge against James and Sirius.

Severus was delighted one evening while secluded in Slughorns dungeon, he discovered that by grinding the Jobberknoll feathers and adding it to the Hate Potion, it enhanced the ingredients’ potential for memory retention. This would be perfect. James Potter would not only have no control of his worst attributes being made public, but he would also be fully aware of what was happening at that precise moment.

Earlier in the week Severus had contacted Lupin about his dress robes and mask. They would be dressed identically. Both would be wearing jet black robes with a satin black trim. A black mask which slips overhead and leaves slits for the eyes would conceal their identity. Two four-inch horns with white tips at the top of the mask gave it a sinister look. Severus left explicit instructions not to inform Lily that they were to be dressed the same. The less she knew the better.

Finally the day of the Masquerade Ball arrived. Students were so distracted that Professor Dumbledore graciously cancelled classes. Severus spent the morning putting final touches to his Hate Potion and pouring it into a vial. He had no idea what Rosier and Avery have concocted for Black but he hopes it is dangerous.

Walking over to the mirror, Severus decides he’d better focus on his appearance. He never put much stock in it before Lily but lately he wants her to be proud of the way he looks. Deep down he wonders if this has anything to do with James Potter’s own handsome features.

Severus despised his hair. The length was okay. Shoulder length was sexy and mysterious but it was prone to bouts of oiliness. A quick potion will combat that annoying problem. Studying his features in the mirror, Severus contemplates his next course of action. His hook-shaped nose held several blemishes. With an easy flick of his wrist, Severus touched the wand tip to each pimple and they immediately disappeared. Conjuring a wash basin, washcloth and soap, Severus set to work scrubbing the dirt from his face. When he was finished, his normally pallid skin looked radiant, almost healthy.

Severus rolls his eyes at his silliness. If he was making such a fuss over this evening, he couldn’t imagine what Lily was doing at this moment to prepare for the dance tonight.
-X-

Alice, Calliope and Lily had their dormitory to themselves. Their other two roommates were getting ready in another room so there was a lot of space for the girls to experiment. Of the three friends, Calliope was the most enthusiastic.

“Eeeek! Can you believe that Sirius Black asked me to the Ball?” Calliope was so hyper that she was practically running around the small room in her excitement.

“Goodness Callie,” said Lily with a smile. “Did you inject pure sugar into your veins at breakfast? Calm down, you don’t want him to think you are too eager.”

“But I am eager. Oh, I just…I can’t…I’ve liked him for so long and finally…I mean do you…what if he doesn’t…”

Alice looked up from the Muggle novel she had borrowed from Lily, The Catcher in the Rye. “Breathe Calliope. Then you will be able to put to a coherent sentence together.”

Calliope stops jumping mid-air and looks at her friend crestfallen.
“What is the matter with her?” Calliope asks Lily quietly.

“Frank Longbottom's the matter with her,” said Lily covertly.

“I CAN STILL HEAR YOU!” shouts Alice angrily as she throws her book across the room. “He’s so duuuull. I bet we end up talking about the History of Transfiguration or Transfiguration Today or even better, Three Thousand Tips for Better Transfiguration.” Her voice ended in a wail and both Lily and Calliope rushed over to the bed to comfort their friend.

“It won’t be that bad Alice,” said Lily soothingly. “We’ll all be together; unless Callie here sneaks off to a snoggfest with Black.”

Calliope grins sheepishly. “Nah, not until the end of the date,” Rubbing Alice’s shoulders in comfort she continues. “Besides, Lily is going to have a more boring time of it then you with brainy Remus Lupin as her date.”

Alice grins at that comment as Lily shoots Calliope a malevolent look.
“Shut up, let’s just get ready.”

By the time the girls had showered and gotten their hair and make up done, they only had a little over an hour to decide what to wear. No less then fifteen dresses littered the floor before the girls were ready.

Alice was a vision in pink. Her floor length off-the-shoulder gown glimmered magnificently as the candlelight cast beautiful, iridescent shadows on the satin fabric. Calliope’s sequins studded halter dress was red and showed each curve to perfection. Her lustrous blond hair was pulled up into an elaborate twist, showing off her sensuous neck.

“Lily, hurry up,” Calliope yells with mock annoyance. “The guys will be waiting for us in the common room.”

“Let them wait awhile,” said Alice casually. “It will make them appreciate us all the more.”

Lily fastened her black onyx choker necklace and studied her appearance. Her strapless black dress was simple and sleek with a slit running to mid-thigh on the right side. A soft black satin trim traced along the edge of her bosom. Her long red hair was held back by an oversized rhinestone clip. Loose tendrils fell innocently from the sides, framing her lovely face.

“Lily!” Calliope’s voice came in an impatient moan.

After applying cherry flavored lip gloss, Lily turned on her heel. Arm and arm, she left the dormitory with her two friends.

When the girls entered the common room they noticed that James and his friends were already there. They were easy to find in the sea of colorful dress that swirled in a blur around them. They were the handsomest bunch of gentlemen in the room.

Suddenly Lily held her friends back and pointed discretely over to the boys. Remus and James were locked in a conversation that looked anything but friendly while Sirius and Peter warily looked on. The girls inched their way closer in the hopes of hearing what was being said.

“James relax, it doesn’t mean anything,” sighs Remus exasperatedly. “We are just friends.”

“Whatever man,” said James gloomily. “I know you like her. You could have told me though.”

“James,” starts Lupin, trying to remain patient. “I just wanted to have a good time tonight. Lily is the only girl who…understands my particular predicament. Can you think of another girl who would have gone on a date with me?”

James thought about it for a moment. “You’re intelligent Remus. Tons of girls…”

“Would run at my dullness,” said Lupin sadly. “Be reasonable James. I am not trying to steal her from you.”

Lily went white in the face. They were arguing about her. James Potter was actually making his own friend feel bad for asking me to the Ball.
“Ahem, you guys ready to go,” asks Lily somewhat uncomfortably.

James and Remus stop arguing and turn to face Lily. Neither notices that Calliope and Alice had gone on to greet their dates. They both only had eyes for Lily.

James lost his grip on his black mask and as it fell to the floor, it tangled in the hem of his black dress robes.

“Wow, Evans. You look…uh beautiful,” said James tentatively.

“Thanks,” said Lily, brushing past James to stand next to Remus. “Shall we blow this popsicle stand Remus?”

As Remus offered Lily his arm, he leaned close to her ear and whispered, “Simply stunning.”

As James and his date fell in behind Remus and Lily, he regarded them skeptically. The soft giggles floating back to him from Lily’s lips prickled his skin. He was going to dance with Lily tonight if it was the last thing he ever did.
-X-

**Okay...the build up before the Ball. Leave your FEEDBACK HERE PLEASE
~nevillesgirl

**Okay, here is that chapter that I have been dying to post since chapter 9. With out further delay...here you go.

CHAPTER 13
HIDDEN FACES

The Great Hall was magnificent. The transformation that Professor Flitwick had accomplished was nothing short of amazing. Instead of the four long, wooden house tables, there were no less then 100 round tables covered in a delicate white lace tablecloth. Two gold taper candles graced the center of each tale and were surrounded by miniature gold votives housed in sparkling Australian crystal holders. The linens were the faintest color of champagne and ten place cards reserved each ornately decorated chair. The ceiling was luminous. Fifty gold crested crystal chandeliers hung elegantly through out the Great Hall. It looked more like a palace then a dining room.

Lily searched the crowd for Remus. Dinner had just finished and the dancing portion of the evening was about to commence. Professor Dumbledore had snapped his fingers and the tables and chairs cleared away instantly leaving behind only a shimmering hardwood floor.

“Lily,” Calliope gushes, as she ran up behind her out of breath. “Sirius squeezed my hand under the table during dinner.

Lily smiles at her love-struck friend. Black obviously had no idea what his flirtations were doing to her.
“Where’s Alice,” asks Lily? “It’s not like her to wander off.”

“She’s over by the punch bowl deep in conversation with Frank,” said Calliope knowingly. “I guess he’s not so dull after all; Oooh, her come Sirius, James and Remus.

Lily looks up and the three boys were sauntering over towards them. They had all donned their masks. Hurriedly Lily and Calliope cover their faces with their masks. Sirius, in his red zigzag lightning bolt mask grabs Calliope and whisks her away toward the dance floor. Lily stared at the two boys standing before her. Both were dressed identically in black robes and black masks with white tip horns.

“Well,” started Lily smiling, slightly concerned, “how am I to know which of you is Remus?”

The boy on the left shrugs his shoulders playfully but the quiet voice on the right gives Lily the answer she is looking for. “That would be me mademoiselle.” Remus bows slightly causing Lily to giggle. “May I have this dance?”

Lily allowed herself to be led to the dance floor for a Viennese Waltz. Remus was graceful and confident as he twirled Lily expertly around the dance floor. After the song ended both Lily and Remus were breathless. Remus excused himself to go get some punch. When he returned they drank the cool red liquid in silence. Lily was having much more fun then she had anticipated though she wished she knew where Severus was. Looking over at Remus, she gives him an encouraging smile.

A sharp, sensuous note struck the air. The band was beginning an Argentinean Tango. Gripping Lily’s elbow, Remus motions to the dance floor again. Pulling Lily into his embrace, Remus crushes her body against his. Electricity sparks between them as he maneuvers her sharply about the floor.

Lily does not look at him for fear of succumbing to the lust building within her. She is shameless in her movements, allowing each turn, each dip to seduce her further. Lily gasps as Remus gently lifts her into his arms, spinning her slowly in a circle. She is surprised by her response to him. Is she being unfaithful to Severus she wonders.

The dance floor empties encompassing Lily and Remus into a circle. Every eye is upon them but neither seems to notice. Both are engrossed in the passion that has overtaken them. Remus lifts Lily’s leg to his waist and seductively walks backwards to the music. Lily’s head is thrown back wantonly. The last note sees Lily on the floor clutching at Remus’ leg. The Hall erupts into appreciative cheers and shouts of “Bravo!”

Helping Lily to her feet, Remus plants a soft kiss upon her cheek.

“I love you Lily Evans,” whispers a husky voice.

Lily shivers and gasps in shock. “Severus!”

“Don’t speak my name,” he commands quietly.

He abandons her then as the dancing continues. Lost in the crowd, Lily frantically tries to regain her composure. She eagerly searches for him, her body and soul craving the nearness of him. She has never known that Severus possessed such a talent. Her heart and mind are buzzing with the realization that he loves her. Severus loves her!

Someone takes her hand in the crowd and twirls her like a ballerina. Seeing the black dress robes and satin trim, Lily rests her head comfortably against his chest. She molds with his body perfectly and finds his embrace comforting. Gently his hand slides under her chin and Lily closes her eyes in anticipation for the kiss she knows is coming.

His lips are warm and soft. It is gentle and sweet, like the first time he has ever kissed her. Lily shivers at the excitement of it. His strong arms circle her waist and pull her closer to him. There breathing becomes united and the kiss lasts and lasts.

Releasing her, he pulls Lily’s head gently into his chest and looks up. Someone near the refreshment table is waving their arms trying to get his attention. Lily lifts her head and points over toward the restroom then slinks off the dance floor.

Hazel eyes sparkle mischievously as he watches her leave him. Turning confidently, James swaggers toward the refreshment table to face the music from Remus.
-X-

“Sorry mate,” said James sheepishly a few minutes later. “I know she’s your date but I couldn’t help it.”

“Don’t worry about it,” said Remus dully. “I told you we are just friends. Does she know it was you who just kissed her?”

“Nah, she had her eyes closed,” said James slyly. “And I don’t plan on telling her…at least not tonight,” he adds with a wink.

Suddenly a tawny barn owl swoops into the Great Hall and drops a letter on to James Potter’s head. James looks curiously around, and then breaks the blood-read seal.

-Nice Kiss, You Foul Arrogant Git.
She Will Know Who You Are; She Will See
Time To Receive Your Comeuppance.
~Snape

James eyes blinked as he read the words again, then the parchment exploded and dust particles flew right into James’ face. Sneezing violently James quickly removes his mask and rubs his nose.

“Hey Remus,” shouts James. “Why don’t you just back off of Evans? I mean, I have a better shot at her then you do.”

Remus stared at him woodenly.

He laughed then but the expression in his hazel eyes held the look of pure horror. Racing up the stairs to the stage, James yanks the microphone away from the lead singer and calls the room to attention.

“Everyone her knows that I am the best looking bloke in this school right?” He rumples his hair.

Silence.

“And the best at Quidditch?”

Silence.

“So why do you suppose Evans won’t go out with me? I mean seriously, I am soooo talented.”

As if to illustrate this point, James drew out a small golden snitch from his pocket and began playing with it. His skill was impressive. He would let it get just out of reach before clutching it firmly in his hand.

“Check out my awesome reflexes.”

Silence.

“I kissed her tonight you know, after she danced that HOT Tango.”

Silence.

“What’s more, I’m not creepy and slimy like Snape. Where is ol’ Snivillus by the way?” James put the snitch away and searched the crowd for Severus. James looked terrified. It was as if he had no control over his words or actions.

James took out his want and touched the tip to the palm of his hand and yelled, “Severus Snape!” A bright blue neon beam shot from his wand, weaving though out the crowd until it came to rest upon a boy in black robes with a black mask.

“Reveal,” shouts James and points the wand toward Severus. Instantly his mask flies away from his face revealing a deep scowl.

“Entertain me Snivelly! Hop up and down!”

Severus began hopping forcibly, curses and vulgarities spewing from his mouth.

“That is enough Mr. Potter!” Professor Dumbledore’s stern voice echoed through out the Hall. He grabs James by the face and peers into his eyes.

“Hospital wing,” said Dumbledore as he lifted the curse on Severus.

The last thing James saw as he was being escorted to the third floor by Remus was long flowing strawberry colored hair tearing frantically through the stunned crowd towards the door of the Great Hall.
-X-

** Please leave your FEEDBACK HERE

~nevillesgirl

CHAPTER 14
STICKS AND STONES

Lily climbed the stairs to the dormitories through blurred vision. All she wanted was to escape the horror of the evening in solitude. Pushing open her bedroom door, Lily freezes. Muffled cries are coming from inside. Rushing in, Lily sees Alice trying to console a hysterical Calliope, who is standing in her undergarments.

“What happened,” inquires Lily sharply.

“Black,” said Alice. “He was dancing with Callie and everything seemed to be going smoothly. Then suddenly, without warning he began vomiting uncontrollably.”

Calliope wails even louder and Alice gently guides her to the restroom and turns on the hot water. “Shower, you’ll feel better once you’re clean.”

The stead flow of the running water muffles Calliope’s depressing cries. It also gave Lily and Alice some privacy to talk.

“Okay, spill it,” demands Lily as she carefully unclasps her necklace and earbobs.

As Alice was shrugging out of her dress, she recalled every detail to Lily.

“And the worst part of it was,” concludes Alice sadly, “every time Callie got close to Sirius to try and help, he retched even more violently. In the end she fled with her shoes and dress soiled and smelly.”

Lily gasps. “What became of Black?”

“She left him in the corridor, pale and weak, still vomiting what could only be described as his insides. I think he’s in the hospital wing recovering.”

“Poor Callie,” whispers Lily. “No wonder she is in shock after witnessing such a grotesque display.”

The water ceased and the shower door opened. Entranced, Calliope came out dripping wet, uncovered and shivering. Her long blond hair hung limply over her face obstructing her vision.

Lily and Alice look at one another fearfully. Clearly their friend has lost her mind. Quickly Lily grabs a bathrobe and covers Calliope’s freezing body. She leaves Alice in the dormitory to clean up their mess while she escorts Callie to the hospital wing. Walking down the many-changing staircases, Lily guides Calliope gently along. She had no desire to enter the hospital knowing that James Potter, the raving imbecile, would be there.

Lily sincerely hoped that whatever was wrong with him, Madam Pomfrey could not cure it. She hoped it ate away at his brain or tired his mouth out, so that it renders him mute forever. Lily did not think she was capable of feeling such loathing but she absolutely, without a doubt, detested James “Bighead” Potter.

Pushing open the heavy double doors with some difficulty, Lily somehow manages to half carry Calliope into the hospital. James Potter lay sleeping peacefully, his rumpled hair even more in disarray while he slumbered. On the nightstand next to him Lily saw three large bottles of potion. The orange one was fizzing dangerously.

In the west end of the room, a curtain concealed who could only be a still-gagging Sirius Black. Bustling movement from behind the curtain produces the nurse.

“Well, what is it Miss Evans,” she asks impatiently. As you can see I have my hands full tonight on what should have been a quiet evening.”

“It’s Calliope. I…I think she’s gone crackers.”

“Wasn’t she Mr. Blacks’ date for the ball,” asks Madam Pomfrey.

“Yes.”

Shaking her head reproachfully, Madam Pomfrey continues. “Apparently whatever potion or spell that was used against Mr. Black contained some of this girl’s essence. Every time he smelled it, he became sick.”

Leading Calliope to the other end of the hospital wing Madam Pomfrey and Lily helped her into bed.
“It is best if we keep her as far away from Sirius Black for tonight,” said the nurse.

Violent retching and choking caused Madam Pomfrey to rush frantically behind the curtain to assist Sirius again.

Painful moans came from where James Potter was jostling in fitful sleep.

“Lily dear,” said Madam Pomfrey from behind the curtain, “ be a help and spoon feed James three spoonfuls of the sparkling orange antidote.”

Rolling her eyes in frustration, Lily can hardly believe her bad luck. She would rather use Dung bombs for moisturizer then do anything to help Potter. Walking slowly over to the bed where James lay, Lilly stared down at him. His face was scrunched up in pain and a light sweat was forming across his forehead.
He deserved what was happening to him. He thought to highly of himself. He humiliated Severus. He took advantage of me. Lily was ashamed at these thoughts. Never in her entire life has she ever wished ill will upon another living thing; even James Potter. Lily lightly brushed a lock of his thick wavy hair out of his eyes and off his forehead. He really did look pitiful.

“Lily, the potion!” Madam Pomfrey’s voice was stern.

Tentatively Lily pries open James’ mouth and force-feeds him the fizzing potion. Instantly his moans quiet. Suddenly he opens his eyes and stares straight at Lily, frightening her.

“I will kill Snape for this,” he said weakly, then drifts back into the world of dreams.
-X-

As Lily walks back to Gryffindor Tower her mind was spinning. Severus, this was all Severus’ doing. The thought sickened her and she detoured into the ladies bathroom, retching. Washing her face, Lily looks sadly in the mirror at her reflection. Her earlier feelings of euphoria were replaced by a hollow emptiness. Love for Severus consumesher, but the grim realization that this love would end up hurting her scalds her heart more then the love itself. Leaving the restroom, Lily continued to make her way to the seventh floor via the ever-changing staircases.

“What is going on with you Severus,” Lily wonders aloud. He is changing. Whatever he may say, what he did tonight went way beyond some boyish prank. It also had nothing to do with being recruited by that Dark Wizard. Severus chose to publicly humiliate Potter and Lily wouldn’t be surprised in the least if he was the mastermind behind the extremely dangerous circumstances of Sirius Black. “Oh Sev,” whispers Lily quietly.

A cackle overhead causes Lily to snap her head to the ceiling warily. Peeves the Poltergeist was doing loopy-loops directly above her.
“Pointy-nosed prefect is losing her mind,” said Peeves in a sing song voice. “Don’t know why everyone thinks she’s so perfect.”

“Shut up Peeves,” started Lily but before she could say anything else, the nasty Poltergeist pelts her with mothballs that explode upon her head, leaving behind a stale, moldy smell.

Lily sighs. This was the perfect ending to a tragic evening.

-X-

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~nevillesgirl

CHAPTER 15
EMOTIONAL INTERFERRENCE

Severus saunters the corridors cockily for the first time in his entire Hogwarts stay. The buzz created from the spectacle James Potter had made of himself snowballed quicker then Snape ever anticipated. Even now, three days later, Potter’s foolishness was still the talk of common room gossip.

Severus turned the corner and ascended a staircase towards the seventh floor. He was on his way to Dumbledore’s office for his second lesson in Occlumency. Severus hadn’t practiced emptying his mind once since the task had been assigned to him as homework by Dumbledore but he wasn’t too concerned about it. After all, he had managed to stop Dumbledore from entering his mind before.

Looking cautiously toward the small group of Gryffindors congregating near a portrait, Severus instinctively reaches into his robes for his wand. Then he saw Potter. He was clamoring through the porthole that no doubt led to the Gryffindor common room. Sniggering quietly, Severus points his want at James and says, “Rictusempra.” A jet of bright silver flows from his want tip and hits James directly in the back.

Severus keeps on walking with a smile plastered to his face as Potter’s uncontrollable laughing grows louder and louder. He hopes Potter wets himself.

Suddenly Lily steps out in front of Severus, her arms to her sides casually.

“Why do you feel the need to instigate trouble,” she asks angrily.

Severus was about to reply when she said, “Ten points from Slytherin.”

Without another word, Lily walks away toward the commotion building around James. Severus watches indignantly as Lily removes the Tickling Charm and disperses the crowd. With one final glare, she follows James into the common room.

Severus rolls his eyes and stows his wand back inside his robes. He just made up with Lily and now she was irritated at him again. He was completely lost in that thought that he didn’t notice he had come to the gargoyle which leads to the Headmaster’s office.

“Laughy Taffy,” Dumbledore really needed to pick more mature passwords.

The gargoyle lurches and a few minutes later Severus was at the top of the stairs knocking on the Headmaster’s door.

“That was some dance don’t you think,” asks Professor Dumbledore causally as he peers at Severus from over his glasses.

“Um, yeah I guess,” said Severus carefully as he steps into the warm office.

“That James Potter certainly is a riot,” said Dumbledore, looking intently not at Severus’ eyes but at his stance. “What a confession; kissing Miss Lily Evans.”

At mention of Potter kissing Lily, Severus felt his cheeks grow hot and he clenched his fists in a ball tightly.

“Okay Severus,” said Professor Dumbledore softly. “Let’s begin.”

Pointing his wand at Severus, Dumbledore gave Severus strict instructions to repel any intrusion into his mind.

“Legilimen,” says Dumbledore in a calm voice.

Suddenly a massive blur of memories flooded Severus’ mind against his control. There were too many to try and stop but judging from the pain stabbing behind his eyes, Severus had a feeling these were not happy memories indeed.

Then it was gone. Severus was kneeling upon the floor, panting for breath.

“You did not practice,” said Professor Dumbledore evenly. “The most important part of controlling your mind is keeping control of your emotions.” Dumbledore pauses and helps Severus to his feet. “You see, if you are given over to your emotions, an enemy can easily invade your mind.”

“So,” spat Severus, “what did you see?”

“Ah Severus, you were so overcome with emotion and anger that I am afraid your memories bombarded your mind.”

“So you didn’t see anything,” replies Snape triumphantly.

“True while I did not gain access to your memories, the process did render you defenseless.”

“What,” asks Severus in shock?

“Look down at your body. Each red X represents a time I would have been able to hex or jinx you,” said Dumbledore seriously. I must make you understand how important these lessons are.”

Glancing down at his robes Severus notices no less then thirty red cross-out marks. Ashamed, he hung his head in shame.

“I’m sorry for wasting your time. I will practice harder for my lessons,” says Snape apologetically.

Professor Dumbledore was about to reply when an eerie screech came from Fawkes, Dumbledore’s pet phoenix. Swiftly the bird circles the room then flies out of the window that is on the Astronomy loft.

“I’m sorry Severus, I must bid you goodnight,” said Professor Dumbledore stringently. “Please go straight to your common room and stay there.”

As Severus descended the staircase he wondered at the strange course of events that just occurred. He didn’t know what just happened but whatever it is it must be serious. That thought was confirmed when Severus saw the prefects following the Head Boy and Girl. All were accompanying the Heads of Houses to Dumbledore’s office.
**

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**I know I have been away from the fanfics for awhile but I have gotten some new inspiration and should be more regular in posting. I hope you enjoy the next chap.**

Chapter 16
TRAGEDY ON THE GROUNDS

Severus had no intention of going back to his Common Room. Quickly he hid behind a large stone pillar. A few minutes later Professor McGonagall’s voice resonated through out the entire castle.

“All students are to return to their House common rooms immediately. An immediate lock down will ensue. All teachers and prefects proceed to the Headmasters office immediately.”

No sooner did this announcement filter through the school did Severus see Professor Dumbledore emerge from the stone gargoyle staircase, his expression blank. He met the Heads of Houses, Head boy and girl and the prefects and the base. All looked grim faced and nervous. Severus dared a peek and noticed that Lily was pale, shaking and gripping Remus Lupin’s hand with such force that his knuckles where white.

Severus followed from a safe distance, making sure to stay out of sight. The gentle swishing of his black robes seemed to echo in the deserted corridors. On the third floor Severus was almost discovered as he walked absentmindedly into an oversized suit of armor. Luckily Peeves showed up soon after Severus had ducked behind yet another pillar. Severus has never seen Dumbledore speak so impatiently to the poltergeist. Usually he was extremely tolerant of his antics, however tonight he lashed out at him. Mild surprise registered in Peeves face before he blew a splattering raspberry towards the somber group and floated through a wall.

Severus jogged quickly to try and keep up. Finally they reached the first floor. Severus know that if he didn’t get outside of the he double doors to the grounds that the lock down enchantments would prevent him form escaping outdoors. When the elite group passed through, Severus quickly turns sideways and slips through the doors before they close.

It is cold but there is no wind. The frigid air burns Severus’ nostrils as he breathes. An eerie fog has settled ominously across the grounds and Severus can barely see the faint glow of wand-tip lights making their way across the vast grounds

Severus quickens his pace trying to keep the tiny dots in sight. He doesn’t chance lighting his own wand tip for fear of being discovered. Looking to the left Severus notices a cloud of billowing smoke rising above the settling fog. They must be near Hagrid’s Hut. Steering himself expertly, Severus hides among the thick trees of the Forbidden Forest.

Allowing his eyes to adjust to the darkness and his surroundings, Severus notices the small dots stop underneath a light greenish glow. There is nothing moving outdoors and Severus can hear the disturbed voices and intense shrieks of Dumbledore and the others.

“Albus-is that…” gasps Professor McGonagall audibly.

“I’m afraid it is Minerva,” said Professor Dumbledore sadly. “It is Ms. Merry weather; former Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor here at Hogwarts.”

Someone sniffles.

“Excuse me Professor, Headmaster.” Severus recognizes Lupin’s calm voice among the muffled buzzing of murmurings. “What are the implications of her…her body being left here in this manner?”

What manner, Severus wonders? Ugh, he wishes this stupid fog would lift so he could witness what everyone was talking about. Suddenly, as if obeying his command, the breeze began to stir gently. A thin patch of space cleared near the ground no more then two feet high. If he lay down flat on his stomach, Severus could see nothing above the knee; but that was enough.

What Severus saw churned the bile in his belly. A body sprawled haphazardly, twisted in unnatural knots was laid out upon the dewy grass. It was a woman, elderly but certainly not ancient. Streams of silver wove through her midnight curls and her skin was the shade of porcelain. In her prime she must have been very beautiful, Severus thought. What disturbed Severus the most was the expression on her face. She was terrified. Her eyes held the picture of utmost fear and contempt. There was not a scratch or bloodstain upon her. This was indeed puzzling.

After contemplating his answer to Remus’ question, Dumbledore finally spoke.
“The implication, Remus, is that we need to tighten security at Hogwarts at once. If he can enter the grounds undetected just to leave me…us, this message, we have been neglecting our responsibilities in these dark times.”

A soft voice spoke and Severus knew it was Lily by the feathery tingle running up the nape of his neck. “But why her Professor,” asks Lily in a shaky voice.

Dumbledore sighs. “She was the Profess of the Dark Arts when the boy Voldemort was a student at Hogwarts. She retired after his seventh year and he desired her post as a Hogwarts Professor.” Pausing, Dumbledore knelt over her body and conjured a crisp white sheet. Covering her lifeless form, he continued. “Luckily Headmaster Dippet at the time denied his request, feeling the boy Voldemort was much too young for the responsibilities of a Professor. This is his way of letting me know he has not forgotten that incident.”

Dumbledore turns to Hagrid. “Please use discretion when moving her body Hagrid.” Looking over at Madam Pomfry he adds, “Poppy, please wait for the Ministry Officials in the Great Hall as they will need to be notified of course. The rest of you, in pairs please, search the grounds and the castle. If you come upon anything suspicious do not attempt tot tackle it alone. Send red sparks into the air and we will gather around you immediately. Lily, Remus, please do a bed check of all the House dormitories.”

The group dispersed quickly. Severus waited a few minutes then rose and followed silently the cautious figures of Lily and Remus up to the castle. He needed to get back to the Slytherin dormitories before anyone discovers he was missing.
***
~Thanks so much for your patients as I was away on Holiday and dealing with life in general. I hope you enjoy it. Leave your comments and feedback here

~nevillesgirl

CHAPTER 17
SECRETS IN SHADOWS

Severus’ dreams were fitful that night. Images of the crude, horrific body displayed upon the damp grass mingled with his own personal horrors of childhood. At the point where his own beaten body turned into the lifeless one he had seen earlier that night, he awoke with beads of perspiration lining his troubled face.

Wiping the cold sweat from his brow, Severus breathes a sigh of relief. He is safe. The monster of his childhood nightmares is long since dead and the monster that killed that poor woman was probably many miles from here. Sliding back down under his covers, Severus tries to get comfortable. Suddenly something rough and scaly slides against his bare toes. Kicking the blanket frantically from his legs, Severus stifles a scream as a large black serpent stares beadily up at him.

Paralyzed by fear, Severus can only gape silently as the snake slithers smoothly toward him and coils around his shaking body. Severus expects to feel breathless as the serpent tightens its hold around him but instead feels a rush of heat flood his frame.

“I have a task for you,” said a sinister voice. “I wish to witness the power and skill of Lily Evans. You will drop this potion into the juice of her closest friend.”

A small clear vile full of thick purple liquid appears in the air and floats toward Severus. It stops and hovers before his terrified face. Then all was quiet. The serpent was gone. Severus reaches out and takes the vile. It is warm to his touch and he stores it carefully on the top shelf of his wardrobe. Returning to his bed, Severus knows sleep will elude him this night.

Picking up his Advanced Potions book, Severus nestles back into the lumpy pillow propped behind his back. He couldn’t concentrate and immediately tossed the tatter book aside. Severus rings his hands together and ponders his dilemma. What could the Dark Lord possibly want with Lily? It had to be the Dark Lord. No one else would have the capabilities to invade Hogwarts and fill his head with such clear thoughts.

Jumping out of bed and hastily throwing on robes, Severus grabs his wand and quickly leaves the dormitories. Once outside in the corridor Severus inhales the quiet tranquility of the night. Nothing stirs, nothing breathes and Severus is thankful for his self imposed isolation at the moment. Ascending the staircase away from the dungeons Severus contemplates his life; his Lily.

Lily. She was still not speaking to him. He has no way of warning or protecting her from this latest development. Walking aimlessly for what seems like hours, Severus takes in his surroundings. He must be on the fifth floor. Suddenly hushed voices float precariously from the Prefects bathroom.

“I’m sorry Lily to put you in this position.”

“Remus, I would do anything for you, you know that.”

Severus froze. Lily’s voice was like silk gently caressing delicate shoulders. She was talking to Lupin!

Stowing his wand and stealthily inching his way forward, Severus continues walking until he is upon two shadows covered by two massive gargoyle statues. Severus’ heart freezes as rigid as his previous stance. Remus Lupin is leaning up against the wall and Lily is inches from his body. She is looking up at him with such compassion that her bright green eyes sparkle in the darkness. Remus reaches out both hands, cups Lily’s face and stares intently at her.

“Thank you Lily for being that person for me,” he whispers.

Severus watches in horror as Lily silently rises on tip toes and places a quick, soft kiss upon Lupin’s lips. Severus fell to the floor in a crumpled heap as the air left his body like a deflated balloon. His heart trembled and stabbed with pins. His Lily, honorable and sweet, was nothing more then a wanton princess. Squeezing his eyes shut tightly, Severus willed the image of his red-headed beauty in the arms of another man from his mind. Rage as a red hot poker filled his soul.

Betrayal!

He would not tolerate it. He would not let it go or forgotten. When he opened his eyes again Remus and Lily were gone. Dejectedly, Severus pulls himself up and trudges back to the depths of the Slytherin common room.
***
~I know it's a little short, but hopefully I gave you a couple of things to ponder.
nevillesgirl
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CHAPTER 18
LOVE AND HATE

The light fabric swished softly against his legs as James Potter swiftly made his way back to the Gryffindor common room. The events of the evening turned slowly in his mind like a broken record; Lily and Remus kissing in seclusion. James couldn’t believe it. Remus was his best friend and Lily…Lily was the girl he was crazy about. And Snape; why was Snape lurking in the shadows? What was wrong with old Snivellus anyways? The way he just collapsed like a man defeated was certainly strange. Something was definitely going on and James knew he needed to find out what it was.

Climbing through the portrait of the Fat Lady, James sees Remus and Lily over by the fireplace talking to Sirius and Peter. He didn’t want to speak to anyone right now. Feeling securely hidden under his invisibility cloak, James almost made it to the dormitory entrance undetected until his foot slipped on one of Frank Longbottom’s partially transfigured teacups that was scurrying about the floor with a cute little tail.

His curses brought the attention of his friends and Lily who all rushed over to help him.

“Damn mate,” says Sirius, who was choking back laughter, “that was the funniest thing. You okay?”

“Hardy har-har,” sneers James sarcastically.

Remus offers his hand to assist James to his feet but James brushes it roughly aside and gathers his feet and wits. With one last look of loathing first at Remus, then Lily, James heads upstairs towards the dormitories.

A few minutes later as James is putting away his cloak in his trunk, Sirius, Remus and Peter quietly enter the room. The only sound is Frank’s power-saw snores. Eyeing Remus carefully, James notices the strange glance that passes between the three of his friends.

“What,” asks James impatiently as he flops across his bed?

“You saw Lily and I tonight didn’t you,” asks Remus softly?

“Yeah, so when did that happen? At the Ball,” asks James meanly?

“Hey buddy,” interrupts Sirius. “There’s an explanation…”

“WELL I’D REALLY LIKE TO HEAR IT!”

“James, Lily is a good friend and that’s it,” starts Remus. “She knows the full moon is coming up on Wednesday and since Sirius let it slip that you three were going to ah…try and help me, she offered to keep watch on things in the castle.”

“And that kiss,” said James accusingly.

“Was nothing more then a show of affection and gratitude between friends,” said Remus sadly.

“Ha! Friends nothing Remus,” chirps Peter. “You told me you’re in love with Evans.”
Automatically Peter covers his mouth with both hands as Remus whirls on him in fury.

“You idiot!”

“So, you’re in love with her, “says James through clenched teeth.

“Lily is kind to me James. It’s not hard to fall for her, but I would never do anything to risk our friendship. Lily has no idea how I feel about her and she never will. Besides, she’s in love with…”

James studies the look of horror on Remus’ face and something clicks inside of his head. She’s always defending him. They were alone at the Shrieking Shack. Her midnight rendezvous in the Forbidden Forest earlier that semester, all suddenly made sense.

“Snivellus, Lily is in love with Snivellus and what’s more, from the reaction I saw from him tonight, he’s in love with her.”

James shook his head. How could someone as seemingly intelligent as Lily fall in love with a grease ball like Snape?

“What do you mean ‘the reaction you saw from him tonight’,” asks Remus carefully.

“Snape saw Lily kiss you and he just about lost it,” said James.

“Well we all better be on guard tomorrow,” warns Sirius. “If I know Snivelly, he’s out for revenge and you Remus and Lily are his prime targets.”

-X-

The last class of the day was Double Potions with Gryffindor. Severus arrives early and heads for his assigned seat next to Remus. To his surprise, Remus and his little friends were already there.

“It’s not what you think,” whispers Remus as Severus took his seat.

Before Severus could respond, Professor Slughorn announces that the day’s lesson was to concoct a Euphoria Potion.

“At the end of class we will all sample our work and leave a bit happier then when we arrived,” said Slughorn jovially.

Snape worked furiously and finished a good twenty minutes before anyone in the class. Lily finished shortly after and caught Severus’ eye with a smile. Looking quickly away, Severus busied himself cleaning his station. He was only going to have one shot at this.

“Professor Slughorn,” says Severus. “I forgot to tell you that Hagrid wished to see you fifteen minutes before the end of class; something about bat’s blood.”

“Ah, yes. Finish your potions class, then sample. Lily and Severus will be here in case anyone has…overdone it,” said Professor Slughorn with a twinkle in his eye.

As soon as Slughorn left the room, Severus bumped into Remus and tipped the purple vile into his cauldron. His palms were sweaty as he realized he just poisoned someone with an unknown poison. Still, Remus was traitorous and deserved whatever consequences should befall him.

“Everyone done,” asks Lily loudly? “Okay, sample.”

The room filled suddenly with giggles and fits of hysterical laughter. No one except Lily noticed that Remus had turned a deep shade of green as if he were going to vomit.

Grabbing her arm fiercely, Severus whispers, “Lying and cheating doesn’t become you my dear.” Thrusting the empty vile into her hand he continues, “Save him.”

Severus shoves Lily towards Remus and settles into the chair next to him, waiting expectantly.

**
Oh my...what is going to happen? Leave your FEEDBACK HERE

**begging your forgiveness** I have been away far too long with that terrible cliffhanger of Severus slipping Remus that potion. Actually I have been lazy has this chapter has been done now for at least a week and a half. Well, without any more delays here you go...enjoy!
~nevillesgirl


Chapter 19
Lily’s Test

Severus settles into the closest chair, folds his arms causally across his chest and stares at Lily with beady eyes. She hesitates for a moment before dashing across the dungeon shoving giddy students unceremoniously out of her way.

“Class dismissed!” she yells over her shoulder as she rummages through the store cupboard of potion ingredients.

Severus sees her hand enclose around something tiny and leans forward expectantly to catch a glimpse of her cure. His eyes narrow maliciously as Lily races back to Remus and shoved the bezoar stone down his throat. Severus leans back into the chair and crosses his ankles straight out in front of him. The way Lily’s mind works always intrigues and amazes him. Instantly Severus knew what she would do next. She would check Remus for clear and equal breath signs and a strong pulse. The she would begin her analysis of the vile and its contents. Within a matter of minutes all that Severus predicted had come to pass and Lily was busy scraping and separating the ingredients from the vile.

Severus glances over at Remus. Lily had gotten him out of his chair and lying flat on his back. His stringy hair hung limply across his forehead and his pale cheeks glowed translucent making him appear ghostly. The soft moans coming from his lips wee the only sign of life from his otherwise motionless body.

“Lily?” Severus’ voice was soft and urgent.

“Not now Snape! If you are not going to help then just sit there and shut up!” shot Lily as she frantically mixes and stirs ingredients. “The bezoar only halted this poisons’ progress. I only have a matter seconds before…”

Her voice trails off and she glances feverishly over at Remus then hurriedly spoons her antidote from her cauldron.

Severus’ eyes widen in horror as Remus begins to cough violently. His face and neck turn a vivid shade of red. Suddenly Remus is screaming. His blood curdling melody fills the empty dungeon and springs Lily into action as Severus is frozen to his chair. Severus’ stomach sinks as he sees tiny layers of skin being invisibly ripped from Remus’ body. Soon his robes are soaked crimson with blood. Lily tries to pour the antidote down Remus’ throat but his uncontrollable thrashing nearly tips the precious potion out of her hands.

“Hold him down Severus!” Lily commands sharply.

Awestruck at the severity of the situation, Severus obeys immediately. The realization that in two minutes time, every layer of skin will peel away from Remus allowing him to bleed to death prompts an emotion in Severus he is unfamiliar with: compassion.

As Severus restrains Remus, Lily forces the antidote into his mouth and down his throat. Instantly he calms down, returns to his normal color and breathes evenly. The potion’s effects are immediate as the cuts over Remus’ body begin to heal rapidly with no visible scars.

“Is he…,” starts Severus cautiously.

“He’s asleep,” said Lily smartly. “I laced the antidote with a Calming Draught to relaxing him.”

Quite unexpectedly a frigid wind coming from the fireplace whips through the dungeon in a whirlpool around Lily. The unseen force shoves against Severus pinning him against the wall. An eerie whistle caresses the room softly and settles in a circle around Lily whose eyes betray her fear.

“Don’t fight Lil,” says Severus confidently.

“Severus…” The panic in Lily’s voice is unmistakable. “What is going on?”

“I am the one who can answer that question or you Miss Evans.” The Dark Lord’s words were wrapped in ice as he spoke and replaced the soft whistling in the room. His long, spidery fingers pierce through the whirlpool and the winds cease. He caresses Lily’s cheek. “Avery was right, you are a vision to behold even though your parentage is…questionable.”

Lily opens her mouth to speak but Severus catches her eye and shakes his head vigorously. Thinking best to heed his warning, Lily closes her mouth and waits.

“Quite remarkable,” said Voldemort as he looks toward Lupin’s sleeping body. “You have talent in potion making that is far superior to even my most loyal follower, Bellatrix. She let the poor bloke die on her observation test.”

“I-I don’t understand, observation test?” stammers Lily.

“Yes Miss Evans. I wished to see if your skill was worthy of my employ and obviously it is.” Voldemort circles Lily enticingly as if spinning a web of fairytales wound with deception around her. “I can offer you a place at my table of honor. You would be elite and no one could touch you. Your power combined with mine would make both of us invincible.”

Lily’s eyes widened. “You …you want me to join you?”

“I can see you are flattered my dear muggleborn and you should be for only the very best are honored into my society.” Voldemort saunters up to Lily and is inches from her face. “An exception must be made for you of course, due to your mudblood status,” he whispers sinisterly.

“I will never join you or your band of Death Eaters,” says Lily defiantly.

Voldemort narrows his eyes and grabs her roughly from the front of her robes. “I would ask you to consider how precarious your position is before refusing such a generous offer.”

At once the door to the dungeons burst open and Albus Dumbledore accompanied by Professor Slughorn breeze into the dark room.

With an evil hiss, Voldemort vanishes into a cloud of smoke and disappears into the fireplace.

**__________


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Chapter 20
THE PARTING OF WAYS

The headmasters’ office is warm and cozy as Lily and Severs wait for Dumbledore to join them. The silence is deafening as they stare coldly at one another. Finally, when Severus can stand it no longer he reaches over to take her hand.

“Lily?”

Lily snatches her hand away as if it has been scorched by a raging fire.
“Do not touch me Severus! This entire episode is your fault. Somehow you have gotten involved with this Dark Lord character; you and your snake friend Avery. What’s the deal, you spy on people in the hopes of gaining the masters’ favor?”

Severus stares silently at Lily. Her bright green eyes are flashing in anger and her petite frame is shaking uncontrollably. When she stands and begins pacing the floor, Severus knows Lily is working herself up for a fight.

“Lil, let me explain. At Least give me that chance.” Severus’ obsidian gaze bores into Lily’s eyes imploringly.

“What could you possibly explain? Your reckless, no selfish behavior has landed not only you in danger but me as well. Not to mention poor Remus.” She whirled on Severs like a typhoon out of control. “How could you do that to him after he’s kept our secret and even helped you dance with me at the Masquerade Ball, betraying his closest of friends?”

Severus pushed himself up slowly from the chair he was sitting in and casually crossed his arms over his chest. Remain calm. Control your emotions.

“Lily dear, the Dark Lord desired a sample of your potion making skill. He gave me a task and one does not simply disagree and disregard a task given by the Dark Lord.” Severus walks over to Lily and forces her to look at him. The hatred in her eyes burn a hole through his soul but she must understand. “For both of our safety I must do what I am told. The potion initially was targeted for your silly friend Calliope, however after witnessing your…affection for that backstabbing Lupin, I changed victims with ease.”

“What?” Lily’s tone was incredulous. “You have now taken to spying on me? Who are you? I don’t even know you anymore and what’s more I don’t think I want to ever again!”

Severus tightened his grip on Lily’s arm as she struggled to break free. “You don’t seem to understand Lily. You and I are connected. There will never be another…for either of us.”

Suddenly, without knowing exactly how or why, Severus felt his mind empty. He saw a wave of though and emotion floating from his forehead to Lily’s. At the moment the wave penetrated her mind, she gasps in shock and her eyes roll back to reveal the blood-shot whites of a zombie. She begins to quiver in his arms. Her face is one of utter shock and revulsion.

My God, what part of my mind is she viewing and how do I get it back?
Severus was frantic. He shook Lily but she still kept his thoughts captive.

“No!” Lily’s voice rang out like a bell through the quiet office and Severus unexpectedly feels a sharp pain stab his forehead. Lily had expelled his memories from her mind back to his.

Severus released Lily as she drops to her knees in exhaustion. All he could do was stare at her. He wanted to comfort her; wrap his arms around her and kiss her. He wanted to tell her everything was going to be alright but his feet were rooted to the spot where he stood. His arms felt like lead and hung heavily to his sides.

Lily raises her eyes to Severus and looks sadly into his pale face. “What you want can never be Severus.” She stands and places on hand upon his shoulder. “You cannot have a life full of love…my love and all that dark ambitious power you seek.” Her voice is sad and tears stream down her blushed cheeks. “We are finished.”

Before Severus can catch his breath, the door to the office opens and Professor Dumbledore walks through. After glancing first at Lily then Severus, he asks them to be seated and recount the events of the afternoon.

Dumbledore listens intently pausing only when Lily mentions being forced to see into Severus’ mind. Severus lowers his head quickly but not before he sees a look of concern upon the Headmasters’ face.

“Thank you Miss Evans, you may go. Remus Lupin has been asking for you to visit. He is in the hospital wing. Severus,” says Dumbledore as he sees the young wizard begin to rise from his chair. “Would you stay behind for a moment? I would like a quick word.”

Severus sighs audibly as he lowers himself back into his chair. His heart bleeds silently as he watches Lily leave Dumbledore’s Office without a backward glance.

Chapter 20 part II

“The choice to do what is right over what comes easy is one of the most difficult and defining of our lives Severus.”

Dumbledore’s voice was so serene that Severus could not bear to look into the compassionate face of the elderly headmaster. As Severus nervously wrung his hands in his lap, Dumbledore rose gracefully out of his chair and moved around his desk to stand purposefully in front of him. “Severus, can you explain how Miss Evans got into your mind? Does she possess natural talent for this branch of magic?”

Slowly Severus looks up and shakes his head. “No sir. Lily did not want to see my thoughts. I…I think I gave them to her.” When Dumbledore remained silent Severus continued. “I, we were arguing and then my mind just sort of emptied. I could see my thoughts in a wave enter Lily’s mind. I couldn’t get them back one she had them and I couldn’t see which memories she was viewing. Why? Professor, I don't understand.”

Severus looked expectantly at Professor Dumbledore for an answer. After what seemed like an eternity, he got one.

“Severus, have you been emptying your mind every night? Have you been controlling your emotions? You don’t need to answer me,” said Dumbledore gently. “I already know the answers to those questions. Occlumency is a very precise branch of magic. You MUST master the subtle art of controlling your emotions, your feelings. Miss Evans had access to your mind even without wanting too because of your feelings for her. This also works with negative feelings. For example, if your particular loathing of James Potter isn’t controlled, he too will have access to your thoughts.” Seeing the surprise on Severus’ face, Dumbledore continued. “I am sure you understand how dangerous that can be.”

“Yes sir,” said Severus reluctantly.

“Before I dismiss you let me say this. Master what needs to be mastered. Choose wisely and above all, always be on your guard. It is now safe to assume Voldemort finds you a valuable commodity.


***
So sorry for the long wait in between posts. Kindly leave your FEEDBACK HERE
Luv Luv, ~Amanda

CHAPTER 21
IN DEBTED

The next three weeks wee some of the worst Severus has ever experienced. Teachers were merciless as they bombarded the fifth years with extra homework in preparation for their upcoming O.W.L. Exams. The Slytherin Quidditch team got slaughtered in their match against Gryffindor last Saturday due largely to James Potter’s heroic antics and athletic grace. But the most torturous event was the distance between him and Lily. She was holding firm in her resolve to end their relationship. While Severus took comfort in the fact that she seems to despise James Potter almost as much as himself, he missed her terribly. Seeing her in classes or laughing with her friends at mealtimes only emphasized the emptiness left in his soul that Lily didn’t want any part of him.

Severus wondered if Lily’s new found attachment to Remus Lupin had anything to do with her determination to crucify Severus to the past. In any case, Severus felt sure his heart would explode from jealousy every time Lily touched Remus in some way. The slightest brush of her hand to his shoulder drove him crazy.

To make matters worse, Potter and his friends were up to something and whatever it was, Lily was somehow involved. Every night for the past three weeks Severus watched secretly as Remus and three sinister shadows navigated the grounds near the Whomping Willow after dark. They never lingered in the same place and they always seemed to be searching for something. What were most puzzling were these shadows that followed in Remus’ wake. They didn’t appear human and frustration washed over Severus as he realized these figures were using the darkness of the grounds and Forbidden Forest to their advantage. As for Lily, she always seemed to be patrolling in the Slytherin area and always when Severus seemed prone to a late night stroll. Twice now she had threatened to escort him to the Headmaster’s Office for curfew violation.

To put the nail in the coffin was the Headmaster himself. Dumbledore had not relented in his task of having Severus learn Occlumency. It was beyond time consuming to have to practice emptying his mind and controlling his emotions on tope of everything else.

Severus scurried along the third floor corridor weaving in and out of the mass of harried students who were late for class. Scarcely looking further then two feet in front of him, Severus didn’t notice the ruggedly handsome form of Sirius Black blocking his path until he walked straight into him.

Severus rolls his eyes at the smarminess in Black’s stature. He is so overrated.

“Lost Black or do you need my expert assistance in Potions,” sneers Severus meanly.

A muscle twitches in Sirius’ jaw before he answers. “You wish Snivillus. I know how your own life is so pathetic which is why I know you have been spying on Lupin.”

Severus raises his eyebrow but says nothing.
“Don’t you wonder what Remus has been up to out by the Whomping Willow?” Sirius lowers his voice so softly that Severus has to strain to hear. “Tonight, follow him to the tree. A secret knot on the lower right side will give you access to a secret passage. Follow it and discover if Lupin is…with your lady love.”

Severus gaped at Sirius as he saunters casually away from him and gets lost in the crowd. Turning slowly, Severus had no idea how Black discovered his love for Lily but one thing was certain; he would indeed be following Lupin tonight.
-x-

Dusk. The air hung heavily as the last remaining warmth of sunlight fell to the earth. Soon Hogwarts would be cloaked under a cloud of darkness. Severus sat patiently upon a rock at the edge of the Forbidden Forest. From this point he had a clear view of the Whomping Willow. All he needed to do now was wait for Remus.

Severus recalls the events prior to getting to the grounds this early evening. Under the cover of heading to dinner, Severus loses himself in the crowd heading for the Great Hall. Avery was particularly suspicious. Severus noticed he kept frantically searching the mounting crowd of hungry students.

Just as he was about to reach for the door handle, Severus heard a familiar voice. It was Lily. God, she looked good with her hair tied back loosely in a braid and slung casually over her shoulder. Her dangling emerald earring sparkled almost as much as the hate he saw emitting form her lovely green eyes.

Severus scratches his head as he thought back on the incident. Of course she wanted to know where he was going. Of course she threatened to report him to the Headmaster but in the end she just stared at him coolly and turned her back on him.

She still loves me. That is why she didn’t turn me in to Dumbledore.

Severus concentrates; footsteps. Peering cautiously from the tree-line, Severus saw what he came to see. Remus was being escorted to the Whomping Willow by Madam Pomfry. To his astonishment, the school nurse tapped a wooden knot on the base of the stump and the violently thrashing branches ceased to move and both she and Remus disappeared into what seemed a hole in the ground.

Severus stood up and began to pace. What should I do? Obviously the nurse needed to remove Remus from the premises discretely but why? A secret passage! Simply amazing!
Ten minutes later Madam Pomfry emerged at the base of the tree quite out of breath. Well, Severus decides, he didn’t sit out here all night just to think about it. He was going after Remus.

The moon was starting to rise and a subtle chill filled the air. As Severus left the safety of his hiding place, the moonlight illuminated the grounds and Severus thought he saw a flash of red speeding towards the castle

So, Lily did come to meet her lover after all, thought Severus snidely. How disappointed she must be, knowing I am hear and blocking her from joining him.
Severus pushed the knot and headed into the passage. It was damp and filthy. A crude dirt pathway led upward at a slight angle. Severus sneezed. Taking out his wand he said, “Lumos,” and immediately light filtered through the dark tunnel. Large overgrown roots were protruding from all sides of this makeshift cave. Rats scurried underfoot as Severus quickened his pace along the path.

Suddenly a violent scream filled the air sending eerie pin-pricks down Severus’ spine. It was the most haunting sound he ever heard. It didn’t even sound human. Severus tightened his grip on his wand and held it firmly out in front of him.

Up in the distance was a faint glow of what Severus could only guess to be candlelight. His rage mounted as he imagined Remus waiting at the end of this tunnel for Lily with flowers and candles and all that romantic junk she so desperately wanted. Absentmindedly he kept walking towards the light at the end of the tunnel. Remus, that traitor! He was the only other person who knew of Severus’ love for Lily. He would pay dearly for this double-cross!

A shadow passed and Severus shrinks in horror at what he saw. No more then 50 yards away was a werewolf. Bile rose in his throat and Severus vomited, his fear apparent. Severus pressed his back against the claylike wall of the murky passage. Oh my god, did that thing eat Remus. Severus shut his eyes for a second then opened them again. When he did, he saw the tattered robes usually worn by Remus Lupin falling completely from the hairy body of the werewolf.
Remus IS this monster!

Suddenly the werewolf turned and looked directly at Severus. It was almost as if he could see him standing there frozen against the wall of the tunnel. The animal sniffed the air conclusively as Severus began inching his way back down the passage.

Something clamped down on his shoulder. Severus stifles a scream as the blazing eyes of James Potter glare at him. “Run you idiot or you’re a dead man!”

Severus ran. He wasn’t very athletic and James kept pushing him, spurring him forward.

“Faster you fool,” spat James. “Do you want to die?”

A stitch burned in Severus’ side and he couldn’t breathe but he continued to run. It seemed like forever before they come to the entrance at the base of the Whomping Willow. Propelling himself out of the tunnel, Severus cleared the reach of the thrashing branches and flung his exhausted body upon the earth.

The last thing Severus remembers before fatigue takes him was Lily and James standing together looking down at him.

-X-

Thank you for those of you who continue to read. I know it has been a while since I have updated...I will attempt to do better. I love your feedback. Leave it here!
~Amanda

CHAPTER 22-BREAKTHROUGH


Severus wasn’t sleeping well at all. Besides the mounds of homework being assigned from each teacher, his obligations to the Slugclub, and his continuing observations by the Dark Lord and his lessons with Professor Dumbledore, the nightmares frequented his mind to the point of insanity. He would begin each new day in a pool of sweat that completely drenched his pajamas and soaked through to his sheets. Thankfully the house elves worked effortlessly and discreetly, changing his bed linens daily.

Before Severus left his dormitory each morning, he would peer into the mirror to be certain that the werewolf Lupin hadn’t really inflicted any damage upon him and that it was indeed just a dream.

Today was no different. Today his crooked nose and greasy hair was accompanied by dark purple circles around his eyes. They looked out of place among his sallow skin giving him the look of the dead inferi they had been studying in Defense against the Dark Arts. He was exhausted but knew that he must pull it together. During study hall this morning, Professor Dumbledore wanted to increase the intensity of his private lessons. During their last few meetings, the Headmasters commented on the extraordinary progress Severus had made in closing his mind to outside distractions. They had also begun Severus’ instruction in Legilimency.

Severus performed a quick concealment charm on his dark circles and hurried down to the Great Hall for breakfast. Legilimency was much more complicated than Occlumency. It took every ounce of concentration that Severus could muster to force his thoughts into Professor Dumbledore’s mind. So far he has been unsuccessful, but the process was nonetheless exhilarating. Sitting down next to Avery and grabbing a bowl of porridge, Severus remembered there last session vividly.

The Headmaster had successfully invaded Severus’ mind. For a moment the images of his fathers’ alcoholism, verbal and physical abuse lingered in the forefront of his mind. Then the Professor had privilege to Lily. The softness of her skin and richness of her scent as only Severus could see them. Then at once these images began to fade. Severus could feel them being pulled back into his subconscious. He had focused intently upon Dumbledore’s bright blue eyes and was surprised to see the contortion of pain and anguish behind them. He seemed to be on the verge of cracking and the excitement built within Severus as he realized he must be close to witnessing a memory of the Headmasters when suddenly everything went dark. When Severus came to, both he and Professor Dumbledore were sprawled upon the floor gasping for breath. After offering a hearty congratulation, Severus was sent from the office with instructions to keep practicing.
Gulping down his cereal, Severus barely noticed that it was too hot and scalding his throat. He was anxious to get to Dumbledore’s study.

“And then the Dark Lord’s eyes flashed and the white erupted from his wand instantly as he mercilessly tortured the poor man.”

Avery’s voice brought Severus back to the present. The Dark Lord torturing anyone could not have been a good sign but this is the first time Avery has ever spoken of being witness to such tactics. Severus wondered who the unfortunate person was who suffered the wrath of the Dark Lord.

“Sev man, I’m so sorry that I couldn’t tell you but I think the Dark Lord was afraid you would warn your mother.” Avery looked apologetic yet the enthusiasm dripping from his lips contradicted these very words.

“Why would I,” Severus stopped mid-sentence, his mouth gaping, “my father. The Dark Lord tortured my father didn’t he?”

Severus could tell that Avery was searching his face closely for a reaction. Quickly Severus masked the initial shock and displeasure upon his face with a look of stone cold fury. This was the man who for the last fifteen years has poisoned not only his existence, but his mothers’ as well. He may as well discover his fate.

“Is he dead?” The question was expressionless. He had long ago drained his heart of any emotion for that muggle whom his mother was so devoted too.

“Nah,” said Avery jovially. “The Dark Lord said he has something special in store for him.”

Severus eyed Avery suspiciously. Does he know something more? Would he tell him? No, Avery was much too terrified of the Dark Lord’s fury. He would abandon any impression of friendship with Severus to preserve his status with the Dark Lord. As Severus rose from the bench to leave, Avery grabbed his arm roughly
.
“Hey man, you’re not upset are you? I mean, I know you hate the guy.” Avery looked warily at Severus.

“Don’t worry about it Avery,” Severus stated pointedly. “I’m just off to study hall. I catch you guys later.”

The corridors were deserted and Severus arrived at the Headmaster’s office early. The gargoyle admitted him at once and as every other area seemed to have a security charm upon it, Severus headed straight to Dumbledore’s study. He was lost in his daydreams when he felt a chill creep down his spine. Someone was standing behind him. Whirling about hastily, Severus came face to face with James Potter and Remus Lupin.

“What are you two doing here?” Severus asked with a sneer contorting his thin lips.

“Dumbledore asked us,” replied Remus quietly, his hand upon James’ shoulder.

Severus said nothing but continued to lend a watchful eye toward both of them. The tension in the room was thick, suffocating his senses. It was easy to lose him to the rage that was building within at the sight of these two friends but something told Severus to maintain his poise. It was rather difficult especially when Potter began to talk to Remus about Lily. If Severus hadn’t known better, he would have thought Potter was engaging him in a confrontation. Lupin at least had the sense to look semi-uncomfortable with the conversation but smart enough to remain silent.

Looking closely at Lupin, Severus bore into his light brown eyes. He felt it then, the tug against Lupins’ mind. A considerable wave of memories flooded behind Severus’ eyes; Lupin being attacked by a werewolf, Lupin being locked in a cellar by his parents, Lupin and Lily in a tight embrace dancing at the Masquerade Ball, James and Lupin arguing ferociously then embracing thankfully. Severus blinked and looked away for a second then returned his gaze to Remus who was staring at him cautiously.

“What are you staring at Severus?” Remus asked tersely.

As Severus shook his head, he realized Lupin had no idea that he was just inside his head. His heart leapt as he embraced the implications of this newest and most unexpected development. Severus leaned back into the wall, arms crossed as he contemplated the endless possibilities of his newest gift. Lily didn’t stand a chance. He would always know what she was thinking. He would always be prepared for her onslaught of rage or be able to surprise her with his “perceptiveness” as a proper boyfriend should. His sudden smirk instantly faded into a frown as he remembered that he and Lily were no longer a couple.

Just then Professor Dumbledore entered the room. His smile suggested that he somehow had just witnessed Severus’ latest bout of control and discovery and was very pleased with this development. He signaled for the three boys to be seated on the plaid couch and as each individual found a place he sat opposite them and folded his gnarly hands in his lap.

“I can assume you all know why you are here,” started Dumbledore cheerfully. “We have the unfortunate task of maintaining secrecy to the information Severus stumbled upon last month.”

Severus looked coldly at Lupin, then Potter before speaking. “I have no intention of protecting this animal, Sir.”

James clenched his fist and Remus looked ashamed but Dumbledore continued on merrily as though Severus had not spoken. “Remus has been attending this institution for the last five years without incident and would have continued on that path had not Mr. Black decided to play that regrettable prank upon you Severus. I suggest that if you want to continue you’re learning here, you agree to a code of secrecy among the four of us.”

The rage that threatened to erupt was stifled by the knowledge that his education was on the line. Severus grudgingly agreed.

After Dumbledore dismissed Remus and James, he turned a pleased glance toward Severus.

“You have discovered the key to Legilimency. Undetection is essential to your success. I suggest you practice fervently. I suspect the Dark Lord would be most interested to know of your accomplishment in this most difficult branch of magic.” After a slight pause Dumbledore continued. “Coincidentally the Dark Lord is an expert Legilemens as well so exercise caution in his presence.”

As Severus left Dumbledore’s’ study, he understood something for the first time since beginning these private lessons with the Headmaster. Dumbledore was aware of his meetings with the Dark Lord. He neither condemned nor condoned this behavior, yet he made sure Severus knew he was aware of his actions. Lost in this thought he didn’t notice Avery and Rosier until he walked smack into them.

“Where have you been Snape?” Avery asked with annoyance. Then lowering his voice conspicuously he added, “We have been looking for you everywhere.”

“Dumbledore wanted a word, why?”

“The Dark Lord seeks an audience with you before your Dark Arts O.W.L., in the Forbidden Forest.”

“Before my O.W.L, but that’s in fifteen minutes. How am I supposed to manage that?” The concern in Severus’ voice didn’t go unnoticed by Rosier.

“Don’t keep him waiting Severus.”

It was a long walk between Avery and Rosier to the Forbidden Forest.
**

Wow, it has been more then a few months since I have updated this fic. I'm lucky it didn't get deleted. If you have taken the time to read thank you. I would kindly appreciate your
FEEDBACK AND COMMENTS here.

Oh, I reread the entire fic and noticed tons of spelling typo's and some missed grammer that I will fix up within the next couple of days. Sorry about that guys.
~Amanda~

*** Disclaimer: Ideas and some conversation taken from OOTP. These are the brilliant creation of JK Rowling and I am mearly borrowing her idea for creative entertainment only.

**Forgive the crazy first chapter. Somehow, my paragraphs are coming out all strange and I can't figure out how to align it properly. When I go to edit it, the computer says everything is fine I am aware of this grammatic set up issue and unfortunately haven't the slightest idea on how to correct it. Thanks for understanding.
~nevillesgirl


CHAPTER 23

Twisted Task


Severus ignored the angry shouts and rude gestures thrown his way by the other students
as he quickly maneuvered his way through the corridor. As he ran blindly, he could feel his
heart pounding in his chest like a pent up volcano ready to explode. He gasped for each
labored breath praying silently that his heart wouldn’t quit. Severus was not the athletic
type and he was very aware of his physical limitations. Running in this manner was utterly
preposterous. The stitch in his right side screamed for a rest but Severus knew better.
The Dark Lord requested his presence and would certainly be displeased if he was kept waiting. Severus shivered at the thought of what would be his fate if the Dark Lord felt stood up.

It seemed forever before Severus finally reached the grounds. The air was still and stale. As Severus jogged down the hill past Hagrid’s hut, the sunlight poked through the tree tops causing beads of perspiration to trace his forehead. When Severus reached the edge of the forest, he slowed his steps. How would he know which way to go? As if on cue, a magical light blue speck appeared and danced in front of Severus’ face. It floated off towards the Eastside of the forest and seemed to beckon Severus to follow. Gulping nervously Severus gave chase.

After a few minutes, Severus turned and looked over his shoulder. The trees were moving! Someone or something was changing the landscape of the forest. In no time at all Severus understood he was lost. His sense of direction was completely backwards. He anxiously checked the time on his pocket watch. He had exactly eight minutes to get to his Defense against the Dark Arts O.W.L. exam.

The blue dot stopped and so did Severus. Looking about his surroundings, Severus saw Bellatrix and she was standing in front of a long purple curtain. She smiled wickedly at Severus who nodded curtly back at her. On her right were three masked and hooded figures each twirling their wands menacingly in their hands, too her left stood the Dark Lord.

“So nice of you to join us Severus,” said Voldemort quietly. “I was beginning to think you weren’t going to show up.”

Severus bowed slightly and forced every important thought from his mind.
Owls think only of your upcoming examination.

The Dark Lord crossed swiftly to Severus and placed an icy finger beneath his chin forcing his head upward. After gazing steadily into his eyes for a moment he nodded and spoke.
“Yes, you will be back in the Great Hall in time for your exam.”

Severus blinked but said nothing.

“Are you not curious as to your purpose here this morning Severus?” It was a simple question but Severus could see the pleasure Voldemort got from asking it. As Severus nodded, Voldemort continued.
“You have impressed me with your magical talents. What a shame of your parentage on your father’s side, however I am willing to make an exception in your case if you are willing to prune the disease from your life.”

“What do you mean ‘prune’?” Severus asked with a bewildered expression on his face.

“I will get to that in a moment,” said Voldemort slyly. “I wish you to follow me. Allow me to be your Master. Do my bidding and the rewards will be great. Of course you must realize that I don’t ask just anyone into my service. You will be required to…let’s just say it is sort of a rite of passage.”

Voldemort’s eyes glimmered red and he licked his lips meaningfully. Severus was beginning to feel sick. Whatever the Dark Lord expected him to do would no doubt be despicable and to refuse him would most certainly be disastrous not only for himself but possibly anyone he cared about. After a long pause Severus spoke.

“What would you have me do my Lord?”

Voldemort turned and flicked his wand. Bellatrix stepped slowly to the side as the heavy purple curtain slide to the forest floor to reveal a cast iron cage with a rusting padlock. It housed a man about twenty years older than Severus. He looked up and locked eyes with Severus and Severus’ stomach lurched; same rounded shoulders, same dark hair except sprinkled with grey, same hooked nose.

Severus was drowning and felt his eyes roll uncomfortably toward the back of his head. He was staring at his father. For the first time Severus could remember, he saw fear in his father’s face. His eyes were bloodshot and wild as he frantically clawed at the bars of his prison.

“Severus,” gasped his father quietly. “Severus!”
Severus shut his eyes and ears to the urgency in his father’s voice and turned to the Dark Lord.

“I take it you know this man,” sneers Voldemort meanly.

“I do,” said Severus.

“Your task, to join the coveted family of my Death Eaters, is to perform the Cruciatus Curse upon this muggle.”

“No!” screamed Snape’s father. “Not again. I’ll do anything…ANYTHING! Please have mercy.”

“YOU! What could you ever do for me?” spat Voldemort as he smacked the iron bars of the cage ruthlessly. “Did your fists show him mercy when he was young?”

Voldemort then turned to Severus and spoke in a hushed undertone.
“You are familiar with the Cruciatus Curse aren’t you boy?” When Severus nodded, Voldemort continued. “I will know if your heart is not in it for you must derive pleasure from his torture. You have not the time to complete this task now. I will be generous and grant you twenty four hours to fulfill this mission. Either you do this and join me or…or I will think of something suitable punishment for your defiance.”

Severus took a deep breath and closed his eyes. When he reopened them he was alone in the forest.
****
Thank you all for your continued patience in waiting for updates to this story. Kindly leave your FEEDBACK AND COMMENTS HERE
Aloha,
~nevillesgirl

Nearly there, Nearly there, Nearly there!
Thank you for those who have stuck with me for this very long story. We are fast approaching the end. I just wanted to say that this is the chapter where I am using a few lines from the text of OOTP for authenticity purposes only. As always, the characters are the created work of JKR and I am not writing fanfiction to produce any profit from them, merely enjoyment.
CHAPTER 24

Mischief and Mudbloods

Severus ran all the way back to the castle and just barely made it to his Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L. examination. Sliding into his seat, he sniffed his armpits. He knew he smelled. He could feel the sweat pouring from his forehead and clinging to his robes in a vile stench. Sweeping a large, greasy chunk of his hair out of his face, Severus forced his mind to settle. He tried to concentrate on his test but the only thing swimming through his brain was the terrified pallid look of his father. Only when he noticed Lily’s penetrating gaze from across the room did Severus take a couple of deep breaths and force himself to concentrate.

The exam ended too soon. Severus was still cramming the last of his answers onto his parchment when it suddenly rolled and flew towards the front of the room. The walls of the Great Hall suddenly seemed suffocating to him and Severus scrambled quickly to get outdoors. He needed a distraction and burying his thoughts in his advanced potions book was the perfect solution but first he needed to double check his examination answers. It wasn’t long before he was seated in the shade of his favorite bush completely obscured from the castle, pouring over his O.W.L. questions.

Severus sighed and lost himself in the joy of checking his answers. The wind blew coolly upon his face and the smell of beech wood from the surrounding trees calmed his soul. Within a few minutes Severus was nodding his head, content that his answers were sufficient. As he got to his feet, Severus noticed James Potter and Sirius Black striding purposefully toward him.

It all happened so fast, Severus barely had time to be embarrassed. He was quick but James was quicker and now Severus ‘wand was well out of reach. A small crowd was beginning to gather much to his displeasure as James and Sirius converged upon him like vicious birds of prey. Their trip jinx was well aimed and Severus sprawled to the ground gasping for breath. Swearing loudly, Severus choked and gagged on his words. Pink soap bubbles foamed from his mouth as James hit him with a cleansing spell.

“Leave him ALONE!”

Severus rolled his eyes and sputtered something unintelligible. Lily had wandered over to defend him yet again.
A helpless feeling swept over Severus as Lily and James began to argue heatedly. Being that frilly pink foam still frothed at his mouth, Severus could do nothing but remain silent and watch. His heart swelled with love as Lily shot down every advance James made. Her ability to give anyone a sound tongue lashing was uncanny.

James was so preoccupied with Lily’s presence; he didn’t notice his Impediment Jinx wearing off. Sirius however was paying attention but before he could warn his friend, Severus sent a non verbal curse flying at James. The affect was instantaneous as blood spurt from a gash on the side of James’ face. As Severus gained his feet another flash of light had him unceremoniously turned upside down, his robes falling over his head. Same flooded him as he heard chuckles and snorts regarding his ancient underwear.

Lily was beside herself. Snape could imagine her green eyes sparkling in anger as she screamed for James to turn him loose.

“Certainly,” replied James cockily as he released Severus from his hanging position.

No sooner had he been released then Sirius hit Severus with another jinx and he was toppling backward, rigid as a board. As he fell to the ground Severus saw Lily draw her own wand and point it furiously at James and Sirius.

As James muttered the counter curse Severus leapt to his feet, his face contorted with rage.

“Lucky Evans was here, Snivellus-“

“I don’t need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!”

Severus eyes widened in horror at the hurt splashed across Lily’s face. He couldn’t hear anything else as he watched her coolly cross the grounds and hurry away. James was calling after her but she never looked back. Everything else was muted. The only thing Severus could hear was his own repetitive voice maliciously saying that hateful word.
Mudblood. Mudblood. MUDBLOOD!

He didn’t even care that Potter had cursed him upside down again. He couldn’t hear the laughter and jeers as the student body was privileged to James and Sirius toying with his graying underpants. It didn’t matter when they released him and he hit the ground with a harsh thud because Hagrid was walking in his direction.

Mudblood. Mudblood. MUDBLOOD!

Oh Lily, I’m so sorry.

Severus scrambled hysterically into the castle.

**
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nevillesgirl

Thanks to all who have stuck with me through this story. We have one, maybe two chapters and then we are finished. As always the characters are JKR's and I merely seek to entertain, not publish any of her ideas.

CHAPTER 25
HOWLERS IN THE NIGHT

With a shaking hand Severus wiped a trail of vomit from his chin. He couldn’t think. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t believe how in the matter of a few short hours, his life had been turned topsy turvy. As he pushed himself up away from the toilet, girlish giggles floated from the hallway.

Lily.

Her name was agonizing torture. The pain prickled his heart like a thousand pins shredding it to pieces. Cold sweat poured from his brow, splashing into the messy toilet. The empty hole in his soul spread through his body like a cancer, devouring every ounce of humanity that was left in him. There was nothing except darkness, pain and humiliation.

A fresh wave of nausea swept over him and he lurched into the toilet once more. After cleaning himself up again, Severus leaned his head lazily upon the rim of the toilet.

Humiliation as he had never suffered it had befallen him just thirty minutes ago. He had groveled. He had camped outside of the Gryffindor portrait and begged anyone who would listen to please go and get Lily. He had been prepared to spend the night out there on the hard, frozen concrete until she had come out to him. His cheeks flushed hotly with the memory of her words; her anger. She was through with him. She would never forgive him. She wasn’t going to make excuses she had said. Sour bile pasted to the back of his throat as he realized Lily was right. There were no excuses for his behavior; for what he had called her.

Mudblood, mudblood, mudblood.

The thought rang through his head like a church bell. He would find no peace. He knew that now.

The door to the bathroom opened and two boys walked in toward the sinks, one was laughing. Severus skirted quickly onto the toilet and lifted his feet. Silently he pointing his wand at the door and locked it. Listening quietly, all he could do was wait out this most unfortunate intrusion. As the boys began to speak, Severus groaned inwardly.

“James, you were plain out of order mate.”

“Come off it Lupin, you know we were only having a spot of fun.”

Remus Lupin’s voice quietly resonated through the seemingly empty restroom.

“He wasn’t bothering you this time. He was sitting in the shade studying and you and Sirius attacked him for no good reason.”

“Seriously, Remus,” James voice strained with impatience, “After what that greasy slim ball did to you, poisoning you like that and then just sitting by to watch you die, how can you defend him?”

Severus shifted nervously and tried not to fall into the toilet. Water from the bowl was splashing his bottom and it was a bit uncomfortable. James and Remus must not discover him hiding here.

“Have you ever spoken to Severus genuinely?”

Remus’ tone was harsh. Severus raised an eyebrow. Why would Lupin be defending him? After all, Potter had a point; he did try to kill him.

“What has that got to do with anything?”

Remus cleared his throat. “Do you remember the masquerade ball? Well for about a month prior, Severus and I cooked up a plan to dress the same so he and Lily could be together at the ball without anyone knowing it.” When James tried to interrupt, Remus continued hastily. “Yes, James, I did know about Snape and Evans and I could tell they were crazy about each other when no one else could. Anyways, talking to Severus opened my eyes to how misunderstood he is. There is more to him than his obsession with the Dark Arts. He is extremely intelligent.”

The discussion continued but Severus was no longer focusing on the words coming out of James’ mouth. He stared incredulously at the peeling paint behind the stall door. Remus Lupin, best friend of his sworn enemy, James Potter had defended him. Shaking what felt like a dense fog from his head, Severus thought about what he just heard. Was it possible that Lupin had an ounce of respect for him?

Severus shifted again over the toilet seat as more cold splashes soiled his bottom. Controlling an audible sigh, he fought the urge to leap from his hiding spot and fix the broken toilet with a spell. Remus and James had better hurry their conversation or his pants would be wet through.

“Well it is all beside the point now isn’t it?” exclaimed James emphatically. “You heard what he called her. She will never forgive him; how could she after he insulted her that way. They are finished, you mark my words and I will be there to help mend her broken heart.”

Severus heard the triumphant note in James’ voice and nearly gave away his position. To keep himself from properly cursing Potter into the next century, Severus clenched his hands along the side of the toilet seat. His knuckles were white and sore when Remus and James finally left and he released the edge of the toilet. Rising gratefully and performing a drying charm for his pants, Severus was heading for the door when he heard a soft giggle.

“Gotcha, Snivellus.”

Spinning on his heels, Severus just saw the transparent top of Moaning Myrtle's head disappearing back into the toilet.
***

Dinner was somber. Severus sat at the very edge of the Slytherin table, separated by three feet of empty space. His friends had enough sense to steer clear of him this evening. They were eyeing him warily as they spoke in hushed tones. He noticed that his friends weren’t the only ones whispering among themselves. Most of the Great Hall seemed to be buzzing and glancing over in his direction. He looked over at the Gryffindor table and saw James and Sirius glaring hotly at him while Remus was busy with his steak and kidney pie and Peter was trying to get the attention of the pretty girl next to him. A few feet away sat Lily and her friends Alice and Calliope, who seemed to have recovered nicely from her bout of frequent vomiting. Her friends were chatting aimlessly but Lily was quite reserved. She glanced over at Severus who attempted a small smile but froze at the look of hatred that crossed Lily’s face. As Lily stood abruptly to leave, a large brown barn owl swooped in and landed smack in front of her.

The red envelope began to smoke and Severus recognized it as a Howler. In a matter of minutes the paper burst open and began shrieking in a most unpleasant voice.

“I will get you! You will succumb peacefully or painfully!

The message then exploded, leaving behind a thick, black cloud. After the dust had settled, amidst the coughing and gagging, Severus noticed several harsh stared coming from the Gryffindor table, especially from James Potter and his friends. Lily was also staring at him with utter disbelief distorting her delicate features. Before Severus could think of a reply to her obvious reaction, a second owl swooped in and landed right in front of him. The red envelope left no mistake that the entire school would hear its contents.

“Your time is up, the time is now!”

The high pitched voice was followed by a harsh cackle and then an explosion. While the students around him all looked bewildered, Severus knew exactly what that Howler meant.

It was time to deal with his father and Lord Voldemort.

**
Forgive me, it is 4am and I am dead tired. So if you would kindly scroll back to chapter 24 and hit the link for the feedback there. I love hearing from you so leave your words of wisdom and/or praise there.

Thanks,
Amanda~

EDIT Okay, I have had some rest so I am posting the link to the feedback thread now. You can find it Right Here

This is it, the last chapter. I am working on the epilogue as I type this but this is officially the last chapter. I hope all of you who have stuck with me and this story have enjoyed reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it.

CHAPTER 26
PERSONAL SATISFACTION



Severus’ hair hung limply as it framed his sallow face and he could have cared less. Its greasy texture made it cling to his cheekbones and for once he didn’t struggle to brush it aside. He had almost forgotten how to hide his emotions but slowly the mask of indifference and anger he had constructed as a small boy began to return. It covered his hurt and shame like a blanket smothering a fire. He smoldered with loneliness and rage, yet remained callous and impassive. Slowly his friends began speaking to him again, assuming his wrath at being humiliated had subsided. He had abandoned his traditional house colors of green and silver and wrapped himself in black. It would be this way now and always. His friends saw only the blank canvass; dark and distant. They would never know that it was all a pretense for the love he lost. Love was something they could not understand.

It didn’t matter now. Nothing mattered now that Lily was out of his life. It was strange trying to remember the last time Lily hadn’t looked at him with admiration and wonder. It was strange not feeling the comfort that engulfed his heart when he was around Lily. It was especially strange to deny every impulse of affection that surged through his body when he saw Lily; to kiss her and hold her and to stroke her long strawberry colored hair.

It was quite warm outdoors this time of year but Severus was shivering. Perhaps it was the excitement of this new chapter he was finally willing to embrace. Then again, it could simply be the fear at what he would find at the middle of the Forbidden Forest. The prospect of his task at hand horrified yet thrilled him with a sense of justice he had never felt before. This pushed the boundaries of revenge like none he had known before. His silly feud with a pack of pretentious school boys seemed futile and ridiculous compared to the magnitude of what lay before him this evening.

Headmaster Dumbledore had sent for him this evening also. No doubt his final lesson in Occlumency and Legilimency but that seemed a moot point, as his path would require him to keep no secrets from his Master. A small sense of guilt washed over him but for a moment. Dumbledore had always been good to him, had always given him the benefit of the doubt. He owed much to him this year for without him Severus understood he would not have conquered the difficult task of controlling his emotions. But Dumbledore was idealistic, always believing the best in people and situations. His path was one of hope and goodness; the path that Severus was taking was hopeless for Lily was not a part of it. As Severus listened to the soft crunch of the grass under his feet he knew it would have come to this eventually. It happened to all of his friends so why not him? A parting of the ways between the teacher and the pupil always seems to occur throughout history. This parting was bittersweet however because this was the man who had given him a sense of belonging and self-worth when he arrived at this formidable castle broken and abused five years ago.


At the edge of the Forbidden Forest, Severus stopped and turned to view the castle that had been his home, his sanctuary for the last five years and a wave of emotion swept over him so suddenly that he barely had time to brush aside the tears that spilled over his cheeks impatiently. He would have to get better at controlling this nostalgic rubbish as not to let his new Master know he once loved a muggle. Even as his intellect chastised him, Severus instinctively raised his head to the Gryffindor tower for a glimpse of Lily. She always spent part of the evening staring out into the darkness. She once confided in him that it soothed her in a way the daylight couldn’t. And like one can always depend on the sun to rise in the East, there she was, brushing her long shinning hair at the windowsill. His heart ached as he watched her, knowing that if he chose this path he would indeed be nailing the coffin on their relationship. He wished her to know he was there watching her, longing for her. He prayed silently that their connection was still as strong as before and he emptied his mind of everything but Lily. His obsidian eyes bore into her face as if memorizing its delicate features and as if on cue, Lily lowered her hairbrush and stared down into the darkness. Severus knew she couldn’t actually see him out there but out of instinct respected that he was. It could have been his imagination but Severus thought he saw her eyes glisten with unshed tears before she shook her head sadly and turned away, leaving an empty space.

Shoving all thoughts of Lily out of his mind, Severus fixed his face into a scowl and turned abruptly into the forest. He would have to conceal all evidence of softness or love in his persona in the presence of the Dark Lord so that his love of the past would not be in danger.

The walk through the forest was familiar laced with intrigue. Age- old branches of Birch and Ash trees creaked under the weight of their budding spring leaves. Severus recognized the colony of adder snakes he used in his challenge against Bellatrix Lestrange last fall, coiling together for warmth and took a sharp left. He was heading into the deepest part of the forest. Not even Hagrid had the courage to venture into the unknown center after sundown. Severus continued to march towards the middle of the forest for another 15 minutes, letting his mind wander back to his childhood and the harshness of his father. When faced with the man who had stolen his childhood and tainted his innocence, would he be able to dole out the punishment he deserved? Would he be able to sustain the hatred held captive in his soul for this man, this muggle who made growing up torture? A blinking blue fluorescent light beckoned him forward.

Severus sensed the presence of evil everywhere. He felt the forces of magic at work as he had never felt before in this forest. Another step forward and an icy chill descended upon him from head to toe. Where there had been nothing but an empty clearing before, now held a full assembly of people all masked and robed in black. Twenty torches were lit and ceremoniously placed in a large circle in which the center stood a large cast iron cage. On the right of the cage stood the Dark Lord in robes of black with metallic purple trim, his red eyes gleaming hungrily in the dancing shadows of the firelight. To the left of the cage was a platform, raised two feet off the ground and made of concrete. Embellished on the sides of the alter-looking platform were tiny skulls intermittently spaced with serpents which seemed to be hissing in anticipation.

The crowd shuffled nervously as Voldemort raised his left hand, showing off his long spindly fingers.

“You know the task before you, Snape.” As he spoke, Voldemort swished his long billowing robe around his ankles and strode purposefully toward Severus. “Your…father must suffer the pains of man, the pains of his flesh. The Alter will be your judge. If you fail you will suffer the same fate but to succeed is to join the brotherhood of Death Eaters which stand before you.” Voldemort indicated the masked figures congregated off to the side, their wands brandished and snickering confidently.

“Sir,” began Severus tentatively, “my father, where is he?”

“Ah, only you can ensure that we witness what you are about to do.” Voldemort’s voice was silky, hungry with the power he wielded over his followers and victims. “If your hate is pure and true, we will see.”

Approaching the cage, Severus recalled the blood in his mouth. He remembered the little boy he was cowered in the corner among the screaming and broken glass. Visions of hands that should have nurtured and taught come at him menacingly and the rage begins to build slowly starting in the pit of his stomach and burning upward through his chest and throat. The primal scream is released against every instinct of control Severus has conditioned within himself. Kneeling down beside the empty cage, Severus whispers, “This is the first and last time I will ever lose control.”

As the words leave his lips the Disillusion charm is lifted revealing a man defeated in body and spirit huddled tightly in the corner. His clothes were tattered and bloodied and the fear in his eyes frantic as he focused in on his son.

Severus regarded his father and made a choice. No more words. No more thoughts about right, wrong, love, hope or education. His life was beginning now, with this first curse. The vilest curse he has been asked to perform to date. Standing and backing away, he binds in father, flicks his wrist. His father floats through the cage and descends upon the Alter. The hissing of the snakes is deafening but they don’t drown out the screams of anguish produced from Tobias Snape.

“undefined !” The third time Severus cast and lifted the curse he began to feel the satisfaction, the justice in doling out the punishment this sorry excuse for a man deserved. Severus relished in the glow of the suffering surrounding his father and as he embraced the passion of torture in the darkness, the hissing grew louder until they erupted into full fledged serpents of flesh and blood. Severus jumped off the Alter and watched with a mixture of contentment and horror as a cluster of serpents devoured his father until there was nothing left.

This was his path, his destiny and there was no longer any doubt in his mind on the way he should proceed. This was his family and Voldemort, his father. The maniacal laugh of his Master enveloped the entire forest.

This was the beginning.


***
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EPILOGUE

The silence of the forest was shattered with a soft pop . It would seem that this particular forest was also abandoned; not a creature stirred nor a breeze blew. The air hung heavily and the stench of moss and rotted wood filled Severus’ nostrils but he didn’t care. He cared not for his life any longer as it has been a disappointment ever since that fateful night so many years ago when he had abandoned all goodness and embraced the darkness. He needed to get to the emergency portkey that would transport him directly to Dumbledore’s office at Hogwarts.

Looking over his shoulder nervously, Severus prayed silently that he wasn’t being followed. That would indeed be disastrous. As he had made a choice all those years ago to be loyal to Voldemort, a monster, untrustworthy and selfish, the time has come for a new choice. He didn’t deserve it and yet he expected that Professor Dumbledore was still the same kind, forgiving fool who relished in second chances. The twigs snapped loudly against the pounding of his feet as he continued to make his way through this dense, unfamiliar forest.

Severus wondered what Dumbledore would see when he looked at him. Dumbledore had always nursed a soft spot for him, even as a student. Emotions long since suppressed began to surface as Severus remembered the man who gave him a sense of belonging, who infused advanced magic into his psyche.

There last two encounters did not go well, the first being when he was tossed unceremoniously from the Hogshead Pub from that imbecile of a barman. Dumbledore was noticeably dismayed to realize that he had overheard that prophecy concerning his Master, but mercifully had allowed him to live. Perhaps he had too much faith in my ability to make the right choice at that moment but I failed him, thought Severus ruefully. Their second encounter was much worse. Severus had come to Dumbledore knowing he was the only wizard capable of protecting Lily. He had come with a lack of dignity, begging shamelessly for her safety, fully expecting Dumbledore to kill him. It was selfish and he knew it. He cared not that the boy and especially James Potter would perish; at least Lily would be free from the poison that Potter brought into her life. She may be miserable for a while but with time she would move on and forget all about James Potter, Severus was sure of it. Dumbledore was not fooled. He was enraged at Severus’ lack of compassion and selfishness. He spat at him in disgust, his eyes not the same gentle gleam he was used to seeing behind those half-mooned spectacles, but wild with fury. In the end Severus had agreed that it was best all of the Potters be hidden. If that was the only way to protect Lily from Voldemort, he would agree to anything.

Shuffling against the pitch black of the forest, Severus strained his eyes for the portkey. The tree branches swung carelessly back to place after Severus had brushed them roughly aside. The thorns and brambles cut into his flesh, stinging and bleeding but he moved forward quickly. Perspiration and tears mixed casually upon his face and he could taste his own bitterness as he callously remembered the reason for his journey tonight. He allowed the grief to overcome him slightly as he realized his Master had betrayed him.

Months ago he asked The Dark Lord to spare Lily. When questioned about his reasoning he simply told him he wanted the woman. He wanted to take a spoil of war from his nemesis, James Potter. The red glint in his Master’s eyes confirmed he had said the right thing. It was enough for The Dark Lord to give his word that Lily would be spared.

Lies! How lies frequently flowed from his lips without recourse or remorse. Severus gasped for breath, knowing it was not his lack of athleticism but the torment of knowing that Lily was gone. Dead was not a word used in sync with Lily Evans …Potter, and it was a surreal, empty feeling knowing that her smile would never grace another room full of people or the soft , flowery scent that inevitably trailed her as she passed you by would not be smelled again.

Severus stopped for a moment and bent forward, putting his head between his legs to catch his breath. For him, it was so much more than that. For him it was a gut punch in the stomach, knowing he would never feel the smoothness of her hand upon his face, the gentleness of her voice in his ears or the passion in her lips as she kissed him. Memories of their love so long ago, as fresh a scent in his mind as if it was a recent development instead of a tragic loss. The fire in her green eyes contrasting with the flaming red of her hair flashed before his face, blinding him temporarily.

Lily.

Severus straightened stiffly and suddenly. He shook his head in denial as if trying to clear the haze from his mind but it remained. That demanding thought the HE had doomed his love. He had abandoned her from the beginning. He had abused her kindness towards him when he ruthlessly called her mudblood. He had certainly thrown her into Potter’s arms with his conscious decision to embrace the Dark Arts. He had put the Dark Lord on her as a possibility when he relayed that prophecy. It was his fault.

True, Dumbledore had guaranteed her safety and arranged for a hiding place so discreet that even he didn’t have access to it. The Fidelius Charm was a powerful secret and only a chosen few had access to its knowledge. Severus snorted ironically at the chosen few with the access. Dumbledore and the Potters of course but also James Potter’s loyal band of misfit friends; Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. It was the last name that caused the blood to flush hot over Severus’ face. Pettigrew was a weasel, a turncoat in search of power and protection. He had, for over a year now, been a fearful spy of the Dark Lord, easily manipulated and enticed into doing the Dark Lord’s bidding. It was his charge to discover the whereabouts of the Potters and how to infiltrate it. When he came into the Dark Lord’s presence a night ago wearing that smug smile claiming to have the power to reveal the Potters, no one took him seriously as usual. He was a buffoon, portly and clumsy, searching for belonging in a place where he was sorely out of his league. The knowledge that Sirius Black had switched his position as Secret Keeper of the charm came as a great disappointment to Severus. While he remembered Black to be cocky and arrogant, he also remembered him to be intelligent. He had in fact sealed James Potter’s fate by giving the power to Pettigrew.

The deed was done in a matter of hours and had set Severus on his course to find Dumbledore. There was no time to feel, no time to think about Lily and the deception that surrounded her unwittingly all of her life. He had to keep moving or the pain of her loss would engulf him.

His quest was clear although the path to it was not. Voldemort, for he would never again call him Master or Dark Lord, must be defeated. It seems that he has disappeared, for how long it is uncertain but the Death Eaters are already talking revolution and revenge, Bellatrix being the ring leader of course. He would concentrate his efforts upon destroying them, if Dumbledore felt that the best course of action now.

His obsidian eyes flared furiously as he continued to search for the portkey. He needed to see Dumbledore as soon as possible. Finally he saw it, the bright orange cone conspicuously covering a fox hole. His destiny was written and now it is a blank slate. This is the prelude to his new destiny, a new purpose and it begins with the touch of his hand. Severus impatiently wiped the tears from his face and reached out to touch the cone and his new beginning.

****

*sniff* It is finished. Thank you to all of the readers who have stuck with this story for over a year now. It was awesome to write and to read your feedback comments.

My last request is that you leave your final/overall feedback HERE.

~nevillesgirl~