A/N: This is a collaborative fanfic by me and Chelsea (Nasuada). What started out as a few simple ideas has now blossomed into this story. It is going to be a crazy mixed up journey through Hogwarts, so buckle up! And no, neither of us owns Hogwarts, or any of the alumni. So. naturally, we are recieving no monetary gain from this. Just a few laughs.
Prologue: The Twinkie Squad
Kel Martin ran straight into a brick wall. And passed through without a concussion. Why should she get hurt? It was the entrance to Platform 9 and 3/4, the wizards section of the train station.
She look around approvingly. This was everything she had imagined. The shining red train standing proudly in the mist, the bustling families jumping on and off, and animals of all kinds making a wild commotion. She would have stood there forever taking the scene in, but time was wasting, and the bookmark peeking out of her novel was teasing her.
Kel plucked the book off the top of her trunk, and began reading and walking to the doors of the train. Suddenly-
"Ooof!" Kel collided with something and flew to the ground. She looked up, and saw she had crashed into a person. Both began apologizing profusely, and the other person, a girl picked up Kel's book, which had flown out of her hands.
"Here's your- The Twinkie Squad?"
Kel took the book back and looked at the faded cover fondly. "Yes, Doug just founded the Exalted Knights of the Grand Karpoozi, but the counsellors don't approve."
The tall girl nodded slightly, and seemed unsure whether she should laugh or not. They were both spared the awkwardness, when the warning bell sounded and both of them rushed aboard the train.
Kel slunk down the corridors peering into the compartments. She jumped five feet in the air as a bang of coloured sparks popped out in front of her. As the smoke cleared, she noticed two red heads laughing their heads off. "Billifuster Fireworks! The greatest things ever!"
Kel frowned. After many readings of 'Harry Potter', she was sure they were called Fillibuster Fireworks.
"Come on, Fred, George. Don't terrorize the first years. Oh! It's you!" The girl the Kel had crashed into was walking up from behind the fireworks twins. "Come on! You can sit with me."
Kel walked gratefully along with the other girl. "Erm, who exactly are you?"
She laughed. "I'm Chelsea Montgomery."
"Well, I'm Kel Martin. Can I ask you something? Aren't they called Fillibuster, not Billifuster?"
Chelsea laughed again. "That's what I thought too, but apparently the books were wrong."
Kel felt relieved. She wasn't the only one who had read the books, after all! She mentioned this to her new friend, and both giggled.
They began to talk for the whole train ride, and found many similarities. They both loved laughter and reading. Both wrote all the time, and both came from North America, though not the same places.
Kel thought, as she watched the dark castle loom up ahead, that Hogwarts was going to be very fun indeed.
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Full Version: Once Upon A Hogwarts
Chapter 1: Greetings and Groobles
Chelsea let out a grunt as she heaved her heavy trunk onto the train. Every year she told herself not to pack as much as she had the year before. But, alas, as usual, the reverse result had occurred. Most of her trunk was filled with muggle games. Ever since she had met, Kel, a fellow muggleborn, in her fourth year, they had both agreed to bring as many muggle 'pass-times' as possible.
The train lurched forward and Chelsea braced herself against the wall to keep from falling over. Once she adjusted herself to the constant motion of the train, she jostled down the corridor, peeking into the compartments while she walked.
Where was-?
“Chels!” Kel’s exuberant voice echoed throughout the car. Chelsea spun around to see her best friend darting toward her.
“Kel!” she cried just as excitedly. She let go of her trunk, ran to her and hugged her fiercely.
“I’ve been looking all over for you,” Kel said, her eyes glistening. “I’m so glad to see you!”
“Me too!” Chelsea said and squeezed her again. “I’ve miss you so much! Thanks for all the letter and emails. I don’t think I could have survived without them.”
“Same here,” Kel said.
“Excuse me?”
Chelsea turned and was startled to see a cluster of people standing behind her. “Yes?” She raised an eyebrow.
“Um, could you please move? You’re blocking the way.”
Chelsea surveyed the situation. She and Kel had blocked off the whole corridor. “So I am. Please continue on your way.” She stepped out of the way and let the students pass.
Kel laughed.
“Oh, I’ve missed your laugh so much,” Chelsea moaned. “Come on, lets go get seats.” Kel linked arms with her and they searched for a compartment. The majority of them were full and in the others, there wasn’t enough room for both of them. They passed the old lady with the trolley on the way and purchased their favorite candy, Groobles best chewing gum. Both girls were still in the habit of calling the sweet, “Droobles best chewing gum” and acquired many odd stares.
“Red alert,” Kel muttered urgently as they passed one compartment, “Malfoy. And I think he saw me.”
Chelsea popped a large bubble. “Just let him try to bother us. I’ll box him up and ship him off to Australia.”
“Why Australia?” Kel asked.
Chelsea shrugged. “It’s just far away from here. Sorry if you were looking for something more creative.”
“The thought of Malfoy cramped inside a box is a nice enough thought for me,” Kel said.
It didn’t take them much longer to find an empty compartment. They put their trunks on the racks and made themselves comfortable on the seats.
“So, your third year already, huh, Kel?”
“Crazy isn’t it? And you in your sixth!” Kel shook her head. “It feels like it was only yesterday that I bumped into you and you rescued me from Fred and George’s fireworks.”
Chelsea’s happy grin faded slightly. “It’s going to be sad without them this year,” she admitted.
Kel, nodded, but said firmly, “Well, we mustn’t disappoint them by letting things get dull and boring. Let’s make this year the most exciting year we’ve ever had at Hogwarts!”
“To this, I will pledge,” Chelsea smiled and shook Kel’s hand. The two burst into giggles and rolled around the compartment. It was going to be the best year ever.
***
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Chelsea let out a grunt as she heaved her heavy trunk onto the train. Every year she told herself not to pack as much as she had the year before. But, alas, as usual, the reverse result had occurred. Most of her trunk was filled with muggle games. Ever since she had met, Kel, a fellow muggleborn, in her fourth year, they had both agreed to bring as many muggle 'pass-times' as possible.
The train lurched forward and Chelsea braced herself against the wall to keep from falling over. Once she adjusted herself to the constant motion of the train, she jostled down the corridor, peeking into the compartments while she walked.
Where was-?
“Chels!” Kel’s exuberant voice echoed throughout the car. Chelsea spun around to see her best friend darting toward her.
“Kel!” she cried just as excitedly. She let go of her trunk, ran to her and hugged her fiercely.
“I’ve been looking all over for you,” Kel said, her eyes glistening. “I’m so glad to see you!”
“Me too!” Chelsea said and squeezed her again. “I’ve miss you so much! Thanks for all the letter and emails. I don’t think I could have survived without them.”
“Same here,” Kel said.
“Excuse me?”
Chelsea turned and was startled to see a cluster of people standing behind her. “Yes?” She raised an eyebrow.
“Um, could you please move? You’re blocking the way.”
Chelsea surveyed the situation. She and Kel had blocked off the whole corridor. “So I am. Please continue on your way.” She stepped out of the way and let the students pass.
Kel laughed.
“Oh, I’ve missed your laugh so much,” Chelsea moaned. “Come on, lets go get seats.” Kel linked arms with her and they searched for a compartment. The majority of them were full and in the others, there wasn’t enough room for both of them. They passed the old lady with the trolley on the way and purchased their favorite candy, Groobles best chewing gum. Both girls were still in the habit of calling the sweet, “Droobles best chewing gum” and acquired many odd stares.
“Red alert,” Kel muttered urgently as they passed one compartment, “Malfoy. And I think he saw me.”
Chelsea popped a large bubble. “Just let him try to bother us. I’ll box him up and ship him off to Australia.”
“Why Australia?” Kel asked.
Chelsea shrugged. “It’s just far away from here. Sorry if you were looking for something more creative.”
“The thought of Malfoy cramped inside a box is a nice enough thought for me,” Kel said.
It didn’t take them much longer to find an empty compartment. They put their trunks on the racks and made themselves comfortable on the seats.
“So, your third year already, huh, Kel?”
“Crazy isn’t it? And you in your sixth!” Kel shook her head. “It feels like it was only yesterday that I bumped into you and you rescued me from Fred and George’s fireworks.”
Chelsea’s happy grin faded slightly. “It’s going to be sad without them this year,” she admitted.
Kel, nodded, but said firmly, “Well, we mustn’t disappoint them by letting things get dull and boring. Let’s make this year the most exciting year we’ve ever had at Hogwarts!”
“To this, I will pledge,” Chelsea smiled and shook Kel’s hand. The two burst into giggles and rolled around the compartment. It was going to be the best year ever.
***
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Chapter 2: Puzzle Pieces
Kel was sitting on a fluffy cushion in the Room of Requirement, waiting for Chels. The room had become their secret hangout spot when they found it last year.
She was reading an old murder mystery, The murderer was walking down the dark hallway, coming closer and closer to the unsuspecting victim. Then a knock came at the door. "Eek!" Kel screamed and flung the book in the air. She whirled around, clutching her heart. "I'm so sorry," she gasped out to Chels, who was the person standing there. "It's just-that book-don't do that."
"What, come in here?" Chels asked, a grin dancing in the corner of her mouth. Then she dragged a large trunk over to the "fun wall", where they kept all of their Muggle board games. She started unloading some of the newest ones and placed them on the shelf.
Kel examined the shelves with great interest. "Hey!" she exclaimed. "This room really is great! It supplied us with more games!"
Chels came over and looked over Kel's shoulder. "Hmm. Twister, Pick up sticks, and-"
"Puzzles!" Kel exclaimed. She reached over and picked up a puzzle box with kittens on the cover. Sadly, it slipped out of her hands, and all 2000 pieces spilled onto the floor.
"Joy to the world," Kel muttered. Why did they always make puzzles where the pieces look the same?
Chels was beaming. "You're brilliant!" She gave her friend a hug and went racing out of the Room of Requirement. Kel was frozen on the spot, gazing at the puzzle pieces littering the floor.
"What did I do?"
**
"Here ye! Here ye! Puzzle night in the seventh floor corridor! Try your skills with a Muggle game! Fun for all the houses!" Chels was standing in the middle of the grounds, megaphone in one hand, a large banner in the other. Kel was standing next to her, shaking her head in disbelief.
"You are very clever, dear," Kel whispered.
The turn out was better than expected. A large group of people showed up, and the puzzle was completed in an hour.
Kel had swept the pieces out in the hall with the end of her broomstick so that none of the students would be able to come into their secret hideout. Then she reclined on her favorite bean bag chair, and watched the Hogwarts students placing the pieces methodically. A lot of them were confused with the concept, but once it was explained, it was great fun.
She watched as the puzzle began to take shape, and complete the image of kittens in a basket-- not what many of them were expecting.
Kel turned to look at Chelsea, who was doodling in a notebook. "Shall I spill another box?" She asked, smiling wickedly.
"Nah, I think it's time we kicked them out of here. I left my good pen in the Room of Requirement."
Kel walked into the middle of the crowd surrounding the puzzle, who were now staring at the puzzle expectantly. Apparently they thought it was supposed to do something.
"Okay people! Break it up!" Kel said, tapping a few people on the shoulder. Sadly none of them listened, so she had to try again. Louder. "YOU PEOPLE GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I HEX YOU!" She screamed.
Everyone scattered. Kel walked back to Chelsea, an angelic grin pasted on her face. "Come along, dear. The Room of Requirement awaits."
*
"Whatcha doing?" Kel asked, skipping over to Chels, who was hunched over a desk.
Chels looked startled. "Oh! I was just writing a letter to Fred and George. You know, to tell them about the puzzle thing?"
Kel clapped her hands. "Perfect! And ask if they have any ideas what to do next. The puzzle was just a fluke. I don't have any plans."
Chelsea smiled mysteriously. "Well, I might..."
*
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Kel was sitting on a fluffy cushion in the Room of Requirement, waiting for Chels. The room had become their secret hangout spot when they found it last year.
She was reading an old murder mystery, The murderer was walking down the dark hallway, coming closer and closer to the unsuspecting victim. Then a knock came at the door. "Eek!" Kel screamed and flung the book in the air. She whirled around, clutching her heart. "I'm so sorry," she gasped out to Chels, who was the person standing there. "It's just-that book-don't do that."
"What, come in here?" Chels asked, a grin dancing in the corner of her mouth. Then she dragged a large trunk over to the "fun wall", where they kept all of their Muggle board games. She started unloading some of the newest ones and placed them on the shelf.
Kel examined the shelves with great interest. "Hey!" she exclaimed. "This room really is great! It supplied us with more games!"
Chels came over and looked over Kel's shoulder. "Hmm. Twister, Pick up sticks, and-"
"Puzzles!" Kel exclaimed. She reached over and picked up a puzzle box with kittens on the cover. Sadly, it slipped out of her hands, and all 2000 pieces spilled onto the floor.
"Joy to the world," Kel muttered. Why did they always make puzzles where the pieces look the same?
Chels was beaming. "You're brilliant!" She gave her friend a hug and went racing out of the Room of Requirement. Kel was frozen on the spot, gazing at the puzzle pieces littering the floor.
"What did I do?"
**
"Here ye! Here ye! Puzzle night in the seventh floor corridor! Try your skills with a Muggle game! Fun for all the houses!" Chels was standing in the middle of the grounds, megaphone in one hand, a large banner in the other. Kel was standing next to her, shaking her head in disbelief.
"You are very clever, dear," Kel whispered.
The turn out was better than expected. A large group of people showed up, and the puzzle was completed in an hour.
Kel had swept the pieces out in the hall with the end of her broomstick so that none of the students would be able to come into their secret hideout. Then she reclined on her favorite bean bag chair, and watched the Hogwarts students placing the pieces methodically. A lot of them were confused with the concept, but once it was explained, it was great fun.
She watched as the puzzle began to take shape, and complete the image of kittens in a basket-- not what many of them were expecting.
Kel turned to look at Chelsea, who was doodling in a notebook. "Shall I spill another box?" She asked, smiling wickedly.
"Nah, I think it's time we kicked them out of here. I left my good pen in the Room of Requirement."
Kel walked into the middle of the crowd surrounding the puzzle, who were now staring at the puzzle expectantly. Apparently they thought it was supposed to do something.
"Okay people! Break it up!" Kel said, tapping a few people on the shoulder. Sadly none of them listened, so she had to try again. Louder. "YOU PEOPLE GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I HEX YOU!" She screamed.
Everyone scattered. Kel walked back to Chelsea, an angelic grin pasted on her face. "Come along, dear. The Room of Requirement awaits."
*
"Whatcha doing?" Kel asked, skipping over to Chels, who was hunched over a desk.
Chels looked startled. "Oh! I was just writing a letter to Fred and George. You know, to tell them about the puzzle thing?"
Kel clapped her hands. "Perfect! And ask if they have any ideas what to do next. The puzzle was just a fluke. I don't have any plans."
Chelsea smiled mysteriously. "Well, I might..."
*
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Chapter 3: The Birthday Bash
Chelsea wasn’t joking when she hinted that she had plans. She had plans alright. Big plans. The only problem was, she couldn’t tell Kel yet.
Since the puzzle night, Chelsea’s mind had been racing with ideas. Sure, it was fun to play muggle games with Kel, but getting other wizards to play with them had really been exciting. Wouldn’t it be something if she and Kel organized muggle game nights and other activities? She felt certain that Kel would agree. But that would have to wait a little while. Right now, she had something more important to think about. There was a lot to do before Saturday.
***
Chelsea eagerly tossed aside her completed Potions essay and headed for the door.
“Where are you going?” Hermione asked when Chels left the couch.
“I promised Kel I’d meet her when I finished,” she explained.
“See you later, then,” said Hermione and she returned to her knitting.
Chelsea dashed out of the common room. “Easy does it!” Cried the Fat Lady when Chels flung open the portrait. She apologized, then ran off to the Room of Requirement. Kel said she’d meet her at 6:00. It was 5:30, so she didn’t have much time.
When she got inside, Chels went straight to her desk at the opposite wall. Plopping down on her comfy spinning chair, she opened a drawer. “I need some pretty paper,” she thought to herself without realizing it.
“Wow!” She exclaimed aloud, pulling out fancy paper with a flowery border on it. “Just what I need!” Taking one of her favorite pens, she wrote across the paper-
At the bottom she wrote in bold letters-
She thought about writing, ‘Anyone who tells will wish they’d never been accepted to Hogwarts’, but thought it might be a little too harsh.
Chels highlighted the note with other colorful pens, so it wouldn’t look so plain. Satisfied with the result, she snatched up another piece of paper and scribbled the invitation onto it.
She was just finishing her tenth invitation when……
KNOCK KNOCK!
Shoot! It was Kel. Chelsea’s eyes flashed wildly around the room. Where could she hide them?
The door began to open.
Chelsea’s heart pounded and her hands started shaking. “I need it to look like my homework,” she thought frantically.
“Hey, Chels!” Kel smiled, briskly walking over.
Chelsea’s expression was mingled with fear and surprise. “Hello,” she croaked.
Kel leaned on the desk, “What ya doing?” She craned her neck to see what Chels was writing.
Chelsea opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out.
“Ugh,” Kel said sympathetically. “‘The value of Flobberworm Mucus to Wizards throughout the world.’ Sounds terribly boring. No wonder you look fried.” Kel patted her friend’s shoulder.
Chels blinked. She didn’t dare glance down at the invitations-now an essay, for fear of them turning back into invitations. She began to recover her cool. “Yeah, it’s dumb. I’m just about done though. I was almost finished with the tenth page when you walked in.”
“I can’t believe you found that much information! Let me know how your grade is.”
“Oh sure. I’ll let you know. It’s due tomorrow, so I should get my grade in a few days.” She stacked the papers together and slid them to the other side of the desk. “How’s your first week of classes going?”
Kel ran her finger along the edge of the desk, “It’s going great! I’m surprised, I don’t have much homework. Maybe I’ll actually have some free time on Saturday.”
“Let’s hope so,” Chelsea agreed.
***
Chels glanced at the clock, 9:04. Kel should be down soon. She and a group of friends were decorating the Great Hall with streamers and bows and balloons. Across the doorway, they strung a large sign that read ‘Happy Birthday Kel!’. Luna rushed into the hall.
“What’s the report?” Chels asked her.
“Kel’s coming down in a few minutes. She has no idea.” Luna’s eyes danced with excitement.
“Good. Everyone!” Chelsea called to the party attendants/helpers: Ron, Harry, Hermione, Ginny, Parvati, Padma, and three Ravenclaw girls who were in Kel’s year. “Kel’s going to be down in a minute, so remember, when she walks in, we’re all going to start singing. Got it?”
They all gathered near the front of the tables. One of the Ravenclaw girls who was keeping watch at the door mouthed, ‘She’s coming!’ Kel, clad in bright colors stopped outside the doorway reading the sign. Everyone began to sing.
Kel’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped. She blushed shyly and put her hands to her cheeks. Chelsea cheered when they had finished singing.
“Happy Birthday Kel-Belle!” Chelsea cried, running forward to hug her friend.
Kel was flabbergasted. “But- How?....You didn’t!” Chelsea laughed and pulled her into the room. “Thank you everyone!” Kel laughed. “This was such a surprise! I had no idea!
“That was the point,” Chels smirked. The group in front of the tables parted revealing a spread of birthday cupcakes. “They’re from your grandma,” Chelsea explained.
Kel smiled taking it all in. She blew out the candles that were lit on top and everyone sat down to eat. “By the way, Chels, how was your grade on that essay?”
“Better than I expected,” Chelsea replied.
***
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Chelsea wasn’t joking when she hinted that she had plans. She had plans alright. Big plans. The only problem was, she couldn’t tell Kel yet.
Since the puzzle night, Chelsea’s mind had been racing with ideas. Sure, it was fun to play muggle games with Kel, but getting other wizards to play with them had really been exciting. Wouldn’t it be something if she and Kel organized muggle game nights and other activities? She felt certain that Kel would agree. But that would have to wait a little while. Right now, she had something more important to think about. There was a lot to do before Saturday.
***
Chelsea eagerly tossed aside her completed Potions essay and headed for the door.
“Where are you going?” Hermione asked when Chels left the couch.
“I promised Kel I’d meet her when I finished,” she explained.
“See you later, then,” said Hermione and she returned to her knitting.
Chelsea dashed out of the common room. “Easy does it!” Cried the Fat Lady when Chels flung open the portrait. She apologized, then ran off to the Room of Requirement. Kel said she’d meet her at 6:00. It was 5:30, so she didn’t have much time.
When she got inside, Chels went straight to her desk at the opposite wall. Plopping down on her comfy spinning chair, she opened a drawer. “I need some pretty paper,” she thought to herself without realizing it.
“Wow!” She exclaimed aloud, pulling out fancy paper with a flowery border on it. “Just what I need!” Taking one of her favorite pens, she wrote across the paper-
You’re invited to attend…….Kel Martin’s Birthday Bash!
When? Saturday, the 6th of September…whenever you arrive to whenever you want to leave
Where? The Great Hall
What’s happening? The greatest fun ever
When? Saturday, the 6th of September…whenever you arrive to whenever you want to leave
Where? The Great Hall
What’s happening? The greatest fun ever
At the bottom she wrote in bold letters-
IMPORTANT!! DON’T TELL KEL!!
She thought about writing, ‘Anyone who tells will wish they’d never been accepted to Hogwarts’, but thought it might be a little too harsh.
Chels highlighted the note with other colorful pens, so it wouldn’t look so plain. Satisfied with the result, she snatched up another piece of paper and scribbled the invitation onto it.
She was just finishing her tenth invitation when……
KNOCK KNOCK!
Shoot! It was Kel. Chelsea’s eyes flashed wildly around the room. Where could she hide them?
The door began to open.
Chelsea’s heart pounded and her hands started shaking. “I need it to look like my homework,” she thought frantically.
“Hey, Chels!” Kel smiled, briskly walking over.
Chelsea’s expression was mingled with fear and surprise. “Hello,” she croaked.
Kel leaned on the desk, “What ya doing?” She craned her neck to see what Chels was writing.
Chelsea opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out.
“Ugh,” Kel said sympathetically. “‘The value of Flobberworm Mucus to Wizards throughout the world.’ Sounds terribly boring. No wonder you look fried.” Kel patted her friend’s shoulder.
Chels blinked. She didn’t dare glance down at the invitations-now an essay, for fear of them turning back into invitations. She began to recover her cool. “Yeah, it’s dumb. I’m just about done though. I was almost finished with the tenth page when you walked in.”
“I can’t believe you found that much information! Let me know how your grade is.”
“Oh sure. I’ll let you know. It’s due tomorrow, so I should get my grade in a few days.” She stacked the papers together and slid them to the other side of the desk. “How’s your first week of classes going?”
Kel ran her finger along the edge of the desk, “It’s going great! I’m surprised, I don’t have much homework. Maybe I’ll actually have some free time on Saturday.”
“Let’s hope so,” Chelsea agreed.
***
Chels glanced at the clock, 9:04. Kel should be down soon. She and a group of friends were decorating the Great Hall with streamers and bows and balloons. Across the doorway, they strung a large sign that read ‘Happy Birthday Kel!’. Luna rushed into the hall.
“What’s the report?” Chels asked her.
“Kel’s coming down in a few minutes. She has no idea.” Luna’s eyes danced with excitement.
“Good. Everyone!” Chelsea called to the party attendants/helpers: Ron, Harry, Hermione, Ginny, Parvati, Padma, and three Ravenclaw girls who were in Kel’s year. “Kel’s going to be down in a minute, so remember, when she walks in, we’re all going to start singing. Got it?”
They all gathered near the front of the tables. One of the Ravenclaw girls who was keeping watch at the door mouthed, ‘She’s coming!’ Kel, clad in bright colors stopped outside the doorway reading the sign. Everyone began to sing.
Kel’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped. She blushed shyly and put her hands to her cheeks. Chelsea cheered when they had finished singing.
“Happy Birthday Kel-Belle!” Chelsea cried, running forward to hug her friend.
Kel was flabbergasted. “But- How?....You didn’t!” Chelsea laughed and pulled her into the room. “Thank you everyone!” Kel laughed. “This was such a surprise! I had no idea!
“That was the point,” Chels smirked. The group in front of the tables parted revealing a spread of birthday cupcakes. “They’re from your grandma,” Chelsea explained.
Kel smiled taking it all in. She blew out the candles that were lit on top and everyone sat down to eat. “By the way, Chels, how was your grade on that essay?”
“Better than I expected,” Chelsea replied.
***
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