This is the feedback thread for The Portrait and the Professor. This is a fanfic unlike any I have ever done in that it is very definitely post DH and the characters are very much older and have gone through some normal adult situations in their lives.

I welcome all types of feedback: the good, bad and even the ugly. I am aware that I struggle with my tenses and always have in each story I write. I look forward to hearing your comments.

Thanks for reading
~nevillesgirl

This story looks so interesting, because of the fact that they are all grown-ups now and they have to deal more with being adults than being magicians. I don't think JKR has managed to show that despite their magic abilities, wizards are still people with emotional and other trouble.

I can't wait to read more! I'm sure it's going to be great!

PS: First! Yay.

Second! Tee hee. I'm so glad to see you are doing another fanfic. YAY! And this one already proves to be interesting.

I have to say, I love the description and comparison of the popsicle to their relationship. That was a really good analogy. Heck, love the descriptions altogether!

Can't wait to read more.

I'm so excited that you have another fic, and I'm even more excited to see where it's going!

I agree with Alkisti that JKR didn't do a great job of showing the emotional side of wizards and like how you have set the stage.

Awww, you guys! Thanks for saying you were really glad I was doing another fic. I was really wanting to but was unsure of what kind to do and then I thought that I had never done one post DH. It is already proving to be a bit challenging because we have to guess at how we think these characters grew or not emotionally. We get to decide if they live the happily ever after JKR intended or if there was something more cynical to it all.

I will try to update often but you all know how crazy my life it at the moment. Big Hugs!

Yay, Amanda! You're writing a new HG/SS fic. They are my favorite, as you well know! I really like the way you described Hermione and Ron's marriage and it's current state of disrepair. It was heart wrenching to think that they could grow apart, but completely necessary if you're planning on going where I hope you're planning on going! But, I know better than to try and guess, because I know you have many twists and turns up your sleeve! I can't wait to read more!

Lisa

Hey,

I think it's interesting that Ron and Hermione are growing apart, because that's something I never thought would happen. I like Hermione's thoughts about her always being the one infront, because you saw that a lot in the books. I also like the way you describe their marriage, even though I don't think it would have happened. I also like Hermione teaching at Hogwarts, because it's something I thought she would do. Can't wait to read more

Lottie
xxx

Lisa and Lottie,
I know, even I am having a hard time writing the difficulties between Hermione and Ron's marriage, especially since I watched a special last night in which JKR actually said that her characters all needed there happily ever after.
The only thing that makes it easier is I absolutely love to ship SS/HG and even though this will be a different situation from what I am used to writing, it is still a story about my favorite couple. Thanks for reading and expressing your opinions. I value them greatly.

Oh, and Lisa, don't guess...you know me, I will more than likely change it up just to keep everyone on their toes.

~Amanda

Somehow, I found Snape's appearance funny. "Wouldn't you like to know what annoyed me?", it just sounds like some sort of Snape-parody.
Old habits never change, do they?

Anyways, I really enjoy the story and I can't wait for you to post more!

~Alkisti

Tee Hee! That line may have been born out of exhaustion as it was something like 4am for me. I think I was thinking about myself being annoyed at being awake at that time of the morning. But I think also there is something about Hermione that has always annoyed Severus...at least in my mind and more importantly for this story.

You're right...I think some things don't change. At least I hope not.
Thanks for reading Alkisti.
~Amanda

OOOOooo... good chapter. (I am sorry you were still up at 5AM, that IS annoying )

I'm confused... Hermione is teaching potions, right? So why did she assign an essay on Underage Sorcery? Does it have to do with her background in Magical Law Enforcement? Just curious... but I liked how you showed Hermione's exasperation. Students can do that to you!

I also can't wait to see what annoys Sanpe and what you have up your sleeve. It will no doubt be good! Maybe you can incorporate a dog or insect bite on one of the students and Hermione has to conjur up a potion to heal it

Amanda, I love the roving frame! You have such a great imagination! Now I'm very curious to find out what annoys Severus, but I'm also wondering who the new headmistress is. You always have so many surprises for us! Great job!

Lisa

Ack! I guess I forgot to mention in Ch. 1 that she is teaching a new subject...Magical Law Enforcement. I fixed it though.
I didn't want her to teach potions. All the other fanfics I have read has her teaching potions and I wanted to try something different.

I didn't realize how difficult it would be to write a fanfic that was 20 years post DH. It is unchartered territory for me and really makes me focus...although hard to do at 5am.LOL

I'm really glad you liked the chapter and I will try to update more regularly.

OK, so Hermione is teaching Magical Law Enforcement in the old potions classroom? Is that why the class seemed familiar and why Snape can appear in the frame that is fixed permanently to the desk?

I was actually heartbroken to read how Ron reacted to Hermione at the feast and in the classroom. I want a HG/SS story, and that can't happen if Ron is in the picture, but the emotions were quite realistic and I could feel Hermione's surprise and heartache. You are quite good with that in your writing style.

Write more when you can.

~Yep, that is exactly what I did. I needed another location where Snape could roam between portraits other than the Headmistress' office and the Potions dungeon seemed a perfect location.


~Thank you for the compliment on my writing. I tend to get into the emotional side of things. I want people to feel what they read. That and detailed description (which I left out a lot of this chapter)
I have a feeling this is the type of SS/HG that is going to be very different from what is expected and I already have the end in mind and even that is going to be a shocker. Just getting there is quite difficult.

Thanks for leaving feedback. I really do appreciate it. Writing keeps me sane. I lose myself in the magic and forget the stress of daily living.

So, I saw this in the Fan Fiction Feedback and I was like, "Hmm, sounds interesting. I shall read." And to find out it's your story, Amanda! Now, it's a must read So...



(I'm reading and feedbacking at the same time Easier for me to give you anything valuable, haha) Okay, so this really reminds me of maybe how she would have reacted in her teenage years.. trapping herself away from Ron, like when she saw Ron and Lavander together, she would leave instantly. Hiding. Just thought how I'd like to say I really like you bringing that sort of back into context for myself, at least ... and there you go mentioning Lavander! Haha, ironic much?



Hehehe, wonderful line, there



Oh, this is so cruel. You really are trying to break them up, aren't you? Sorry, I just saw HBP, so I'm in total R/Hr mood right now, even though I love both. I'm just having my own issues, haha, but anyway...

I'm actually tearing up; like I said, cause of my own issues, seeing HBP, and how sad that is. But it was well written. I can't wait to read the next chapter, and I'm glad to actually get to follow one of your stories this time instead of reading the whole thing in one bite, hah.

-Kiersten-

Why was Snape annoyed? Or are we going to find that out later?

I'm faint-hearted when it comes to break-ups. I hate the empty feeling you're left with afterwards to deal with. I can imagine how horrible, and how sudden this must have felt for Hermione. Problems in marriage are reasonable, but noone should let things pile up because it will be harder to deal with them later.

I can't wait to see how this is going. I like grown-up Hermione/Ron better than the teenager ones actually.

~Alkisti

Amanda, chapter 3 was heartbreaking, but I loved it! I could feel both Hermione's and Ron's pain. It's such a sad break up; they've grown apart, but obviously still love each other. I almost want to root for them...almost! But you know who I'm really rooting for! I'll be patient though; I don't mind waiting as long as there promises to be some romance between Hermione and my sexy professor!

Great Job,
Lisa

You guys are making me nervous!

This may end up not being what any of you expect. Everyone may be surprised at where this ends up. I already have the ending planned...I just need to get the characters there.

I needed the meltdown of Ron and Hermione to be heartbreaking because that is what happens in a relationship when two people are drifting apart. I wanted Ron to tell her how he felt, after all, he is an adult now and shouldn't always be walking on eggshells around Hermione.
I wanted to show that when Hermione hides out and throws herself into her work, that is her defense mechanism and not something that would go away just because she has grown up.

Alkisti, I promise I will explain why Snape is annoyed. I mean, when was he not annoyed with Hermione? LOL

Thanks for the comments guys and for overlooking the bad spelling and grammar...you guys rock!

Aw, don't be nervous. It doesn't matter if the ending is not what we are expecting, it's the story and how it is told that's important, and you're great at that. So just keep writing and we'll keep reading!

Lisa

I noticed a minor spelling mistake:



I'm not good enough in english though to tell between wrong tenses etc. I just enjoy the story.

I liked this chapter so much because things are not going smoothly. In contrast to other fanfics I've read, this is a more mature one. It's about adulthood and all of the problems one has to deal with. No easy solutions can be found, and disappointment is always around the corner.

I enjoy this story a lot. Update soon!

PS: Oh and I don't mind about the ending either. It's the journey that matters, not the destination.

Btw, how long is it going to be?

~Alkisti

Sorry about the spelling. It is 4:30 a.m and I haven't been to sleep yet. I will get it changed.

I have no idea how long this is going to be. I don't want it too long though. I want to get to the climax sort of quickly but then again, I have a way of twisting and turning the stories I write.

I am really glad you like this one. I wanted to do something a bit different and will try to stay true to that idea throughout the story.

Take care,
Amanda

(other than some cursor-induced spelling errors, nothing to complain about... looks like the cursor did it's own thing around the whole evaluation scene)

I like where this will go. It's funny to think Snape can teach Hermione how to "let her hair down" and loosen up her teaching style. So, Hermione is more like Professor Binns than she'd ever dream she'd be? Poor thing has her marriage fall apart and can't even escape into her work. I guess this is something she'll have to learn from... that she can't always escape when there is a problem she doesn't want to deal with.

I do wonder what she did and said when she was on her little bender, and why Snape gets to upset about it. Hmmm...

I do like your story and can't wait to read more!

Great chapter 4! I loved Severus' offer to teach Hermione. How undeniably Snapey of him; such arrogance...I love it! Hermione's question at the end: has me wondering now too! What on Earth did she do? I can't wait to find out!

Lisa

Hahaha. I could laugh on and on, and I don't know why, but imagining Snape saying this line is just too good to be true. But anyway... I agree with Lisa. I am very curious as to what Hermione did the night she was.. wasted, I guess I could say. And I love how you made her vulnerable by using drinking. We don't see a lot of things/issues like that in the books and it makes it suggests that seeing people with drinking problems or disorders is very rare in the wizarding world, except for Mundungus, of course.

The spelling mistakes (well, more like some bunching of words..) were fine, in my opinion. Minor stuff that doesn't really matter to me as long as I get to read it and get the point across. Can't wait to read more. I just feel really bad for Hermione. Her life is falling apart, but I love how you're bringing Severus in to actually try and help her get it back together. It's something I never think of him doing except in a SS/HG ship!

-Kiersten-

Thanks Kathleen. I went back and I think I got all of them. It looks like I forgot what the space bar's function was for.

Lisa, my husband's computer isn't able to open VTM so I email him the chapters. One of the first things he said was he loved Snape's arrogance too. You know me, I'm really big on trying to stay pretty true to the main characteristics of each of JKR's creation.

*muahaha* you all will just have to wait and see about Hermione's behavior during her, ahem, black out.

Thanks you Kiersten for appreciating the vulnerability I am trying to capture in Hermione. I am also concentrating on the struggle of her trying to keep her life together when so many aspects of it are spiraling out of control.

Thanks for reading everyone.

Maybe I'm completely wrong, but I have my ideas where this might be going.. or where Hermione's going Or maybe it's just what I want to see, haha. You'll surprise me, I'm sure of it.

I really liked this chapter, and the potion was very well thought out.. I rather like it, and it fits that Severus would know how to do it since he is the amazing Half-Blood Prince. Anyways, great job, and I nearly flipped out when I saw that you had posted, haha. I can't wait to read the next chapter, as always.

-Kiersten-

I think she's apparating inside the portrait? Maybe this portrait is a whole different world and maybe Snape will show her everything she needs to know. And then...okay I'm spoiling the story.

I can't wait to read more! There's always something very...interesting about Snape.

Post soon!

~Alkisti

Ding ding ding! I didn't do a very good job about being vague on where she was apparating. I think what I am trying to do is going to be difficult and I am not sure how to accomplish it. I am also trying to bring Ron around somehow and I want it to do it through some sort of family gathering. I have two options here and am leaning more toward the first one simply because it flows more with the overall vibe of the story.

Thanks for reading. I'm sorry it has been so long between posts...I was registering for collage of all things and today is my first day! I will try and keep up and I hope my homework will allow me to update sooner.

so good! i really like the way that she's doing as he say and not questioning what he tells her to do, but is still skeptical. really like it, think its great, and cant wait for you to update soon!

Lottie
xxx

First of all, congrats on being a college gal! I hope you enjoy it...as much as I'm enjoying this story! This part in particular made me drool:
I am anxiously awaiting Hermione's arrival inside the portrait. I can't wait to find out what it looks like in there; I know I will find out because you're so thorough with your descriptions. Now, I realize that you're going to bring Ron into this and I understand why, but frankly, I just want more Sev!!

Hugs,
Lisa

I know...just a small taste of what we all imagine Severus would sound like in our heads...that was my mean tease. As for bringing in Ron, I know all about just wanting to toss him aside and have it strictly more Severus and for the most part it will be all about Severus and Hermione. Ron being kind of around but not really just adds a different dimension of conflict.

Thanks for the college wishes. I wanted to try something new at this point in my life.

I'm with Lisa. That "come to me" sent shivers down my spine. Awesome! I just love the details and descriptions you put in to everthing. Really paints a picture in the mind. Can't wait for the next update!!!