Hi, i'm very new at the whole story writing business, let alone HP fanfic writing! However, i think i may have a bit of a treat for you here. Please don't hesitate to let me know what you think about it. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as i did writing it!

Please and Thankyou!

Lara

Wow that was great!! I totally loved it! How can I criticise this? You described everything so well... I especially like the ending

thank you for your high praise. It is really encouraging.

I don't write much, because I'm not all that confident in it, and I always finishing up being caught up in the plot and it becomes stale and boring. I figured this would be an ok way to start, with an ending pre-written for me!

I also really figured that James and Lily needed their story told. It was so fascintating for me to try and imagine what was going through their mind 'that night'. It's such a beautiful idea, and easy to turn into a "nice" piece of writing, even though it was really such a horrible tragedy.

But thank you very much for letting me know what you thought. It is very appreciated!

Lara xx

Hey!!
No feedback thread so Im gunna just leave it here....
I thought it was really well written and the feelings that were in it were great. I love your writing style and think this story was amazing...it seemed so real LOL...awesome job!!!
Courtney

Where are all the feedback threads? well anyway, i will have to reply here. I love this! The way you wrote it is just awesome! lol. I really enjoyed reading it!

I'll set up a feedback thread for you just this once and slplit the replies George's Girl, but in the meantime, please review the rules and the "How to start up a fic" threads pinned at the top of the fanfic forum.

Goodluck with your story!

razz

Hi but I thought this was the feedback thread Here

Maybe you should have looked more carefully since thats exactlly where I replied...

ginny and harry 4ever

thank you ginny...

sorry people! i...um...don't know how to make a link between threads... please don't hold it against me. i definitely started a thread, as ginny shows in the link, but i'm sorry, i should have asked some one about how i do a link.

my fault, sorry again.

anyway, thank you all for your comments. they mean a lot to me. i'm very glad you liked the story so much. thank you!!!

Oh poopsy!! I was cleaning up the threads that hadn't put in feedback links and because I came across this one with replies and no link I assumed there wasn't one.

Anyway, sorted now, I've merged the topics so its all on one thread.

George's girl, if you want to see the quick way to make a link, click on the edit button on your post where I placed the link and you'll see how it's done. Basically you type in [*url=, and then paste the copied link to your feedback thread in, the put a backet like ] then type in the words you want to appear then type [*/url] all without the asterisks I've put in. If you have any trouble with future fics let me know. For now you can click on the edit button and just copy and paste the link exactly as I placed it in your chappie.

oooh! thank you so much razzberry!! you are a legend!!!

*gives razzberry a big hug* many, many thanks.

you mods do such a great job.

hope everyone is liking my story, well, my description of the story. glad to hear from you wonderful people who have posted, it's very encouraging.

well, back to work. yuk, uni assignments.

hope to hear more of what you all thought!

xx Lara xx

Well since you asked me so nicely to read it and comment on it... I just read it and now I must comment on it iI guess.. ()

Anyway that wasa great story. It was really different from other stories i have read, and that made it so special. It's really cool how you worked out the thoughts, very nice. Maybe you should be more confident i your writing skills

I tend to write things too and sometimes i get too caught up in the dialogue's instead of the describing part of the story. Anywya it was a great story.

why thank you erik. i'm glad you thought so.

thanks for reading it.

i will always remember my year 11 english teacher drilling us to "show, not tell" when writing stories...like, describe things in creative and original ways.

i know what you mean, getting caught up the dialogue. that's why i found this a little easier. with all the aprehension that night, there wouldn't have been much 'casual chatting' if you know what i mean. and most of the dialogue, i actually got straight from the source - JK Rowling. most of it is taken from PoA, in the memories Harry hears when facing the dementors.

so, yeah, thanks!!! it means a lot!

Wow! That was great! Very Rowling. I think you should write more! Not on this topic, oviously, but more stories. Why not try writing your own idea, not something that you already basically know. Try writing something other than a one-shot. You are great!

wow!
a great one-shot!
i thought about writing a fic about that too, lately...
i just found yours... it's beautifully written! all their mixed feelings and how they care about their family...
i love it!
-kathy

I absolutely loved it! You have a real talent in writing, and I've read alot of fan fics! I liked how you portrayed the emotions of Lily and James, it fit with what Harry remembers in the books. I have nothing to critique, so great job!